The 1-Year Mark - Breastfeeding beyond the First Year

My baby boy has just turned one year old on November 6. This means, that I have been fully breastfeeding him for a whole year, yeay! Despite my breast abscess, I did it, double yeay!!
Read about my breast abscess challenges here, here and here.

My breast milk was not as abundant as before, but still more than enough for my little boy’s needs. In addition to the breast abscess, I also survived a sudden two-week nursing strike when he just 6 months old. It was heart-wrenching to see your baby refusing and yelling at your breast, and when you pop in a bottle, he began to suck like there’s no tomorrow. But that’s another story for another day.

Here’s a sneak peek of Aliff’s first birthday party.


That’s Thomas the Tank Engine on top of a 2.5 kg of chocolate moist cake, from Howzat’s Creation. Simply ravishing!

Here’s the birthday boy, accompanied by his lovely mom (ahem).


Ermmm… I’m digressing here.

So, one more year of breastfeeding and pumping to go. More or less. I was thinking to stop pumping when he turns two and just breastfeeding through the nights and weekends only. But then again, one year is a long time, so we’ll see how it goes.

I found this video of breastfeeding moms, which I think is very sweet. It shows of how moms nursing anytime, anywhere, from the Eiffel tower, to the beach, to the Brooklyn bridge, even on top of a mountain! I wish my breastfeeding adventures were as exotic, but I prefer to be a little discreet when nursing. To me, nursing my baby is a private affair so I don’t show it off. Plus, I’m terrified that some skin might show! No way Jose!

This is the only photo of me breastfeeding in a somewhat public place. I was in the car, on the charter ferry in Penang, Malaysia. Our car windows are tinted darker, so the image clarity isn’t too good. But if you strain your eyes just a little bit, you can see me nursing my boy in the passenger seat.

How about you? Come and share your breastfeeding experiences, and link up here. There’ll be an exciting giveaway for everyone who links up, something fun to do with your child. I’ll tell more about this giveaway in my next post, but I’ll give just one clue: Alphabets!

A good night’s sleep is a mom’s luxury

Aliah at 3 months old. She looked like a boy!

I read a quote somewhere which says “Where there’s a newborn baby, there’s a sleepy mom out there.” Indeed, sleep is no longer a necessity; it’s a luxury, like that special bottle of perfume you buy when you get your annual bonus. Something like that. My daughter did not start sleeping through the night until recently. I was surprised when I woke up in the morning on my own accord and not in the middle of the night because of her cries. Even so, after a week of two of blissful sleep, she starts changing her sleep pattern again, waking up but not wanting milk (when I already prepared a bottle and gave it to her) but she’s just thirsty and wants water. Then she starts babbling and drifts back to sleep on her own.

Oh but that was an easy night. Months before that, there were many nights of torture for both me and my husband. My daughter’s sleep patterns had been a volatile graph right from the start. She has difficulties falling asleep and wakes up too easily. We’ve tried a LOT of ways to get her to sleep e.g. on our bed, in her crib, swaddled in the baby rocker, swaddled in the traditional spring buai, on our laps, on our shoulders, on a full stomach, in a quiet and dark room, in the hall with the tv booming, nurse her to sleep and some others that I can’t remember. She had been sleeping in the spring buai until a few months back recently until I decided to make her fall asleep on her own in her cot (because I was too tired to sit up and swing the buai up and down every time she cries. My arms hurt.)

You know the cry-it-out method to get your baby to sleep? I decided to try it out. After her diaper and night clothing change, her bottle of milk and her reading session, I’ll put her in her cot wide awake with her water bottle. (Sometimes she drinks water from her bottle until she falls asleep.) Then I’ll turn off the lights, give her one last kiss and hug and lie down in my bed beside her cot. Most of the time, she’d still want to continue playing in the dark, throwing her pillows at me, sometimes poking me in the face. I would just ignore her and pretend to sleep (most of the time, I really slept instead of just pretending). I’d hear her babble, walk around her cot, gulping down water and rolling around trying to sleep. It’d take around 30 to 45 minutes, but she did sleep on her own in the end. Voila!

So in case you want to try it out with your baby, here’s the tried and tested way of doing it, from http://www.itstimetosleep.com/. But remember, you know your baby best and the steps are for a guideline only. (I didn't follow every single step either. I just did the best I could.) In the end, you just got to whing it and deal with it.

The Key Steps to Settling Your Baby

• Newborn - 6 months
• 6 to 12 months
• Tips on settling the older toddler

The decision to change your baby’s sleeping habits is not one you will make lightly. Generally parents have reached their threshold of exhaustion when they decide to take on the commitment of change.These techniques are not for everyone, there is some crying involved. Some babies will respond immediately to the techniques while others can take up to 3 weeks. Persistence is the key to success as babies learn from repetition.Try to hold this thought – these settling techniques will be no harder than what you are already going through.

The following things should be considered before starting a settling program.

1. Ensure your baby is well.
2. Any concerns you might have should be cleared with your doctor before starting.
3. If your baby becomes unwell during the weeks that you are attempting to get the program to work, stop and start again when they are well.
4. Make sure you yourself are well. It won’t do either of you any good to be starting a new routine under stress.
5. Try to keep a fairly free week so you can devote as much time and effort as possible into making the program work. A busy schedule will make it harder to do the techniques with each sleep and take longer to work.
6. If you have other caregivers, make sure they follow the new routine. This is to ensure that there are no mixed messages being given.
7. Make sure the cot is well ventilated with no bumpers or pillows.
8. Remove all toys from the cot. The cot should be designated for sleeping rather than playing.
9. Have a dim night light so as baby can see their surroundings when they wake.
10. Make sure your partner is agreeable about the new routine. Even if they don’t wish to be overly involved in the settling, explain to them what it is that you are attempting to do so they can appreciate the added pressure you are under. They too will be great beneficiaries of a child that sleeps well.
11. If not your partner, try and have a support person to take over for you if need be.

Newborn - 6 months

SIDS and Kids Australia recommend wrapping a baby and sleeping them on their back. We always recommend that all parents follow SIDS guidelines when your baby is asleep. During the program we use a technique of settling a baby on their side, however you should never leave your baby to sleep in this position. Follow these steps to settle your baby:

Courtesy of www.vanillajoy.com

1. Wrap your baby firmly but not tightly in a lightweight material, cotton or muslin is ideal. This will help him feel secure and take control of his hands, stopping him from catching himself on the face if he flails around. Once baby is sleeping we will then loosen the wrap and roll baby onto their back. Always ensure wrapping is well secured and unable to cover your babies breathing passages. Wrapping is not required after the age of 3 months.
2. Place him in his cot on his side, facing away from you, and with his feet close to the end of the cot. This is to avoid any eye contact.
3. Make a note of the time: you’re going to give him 15 minutes to settle. Place one hand on his shoulder and with the other hand pat his bottom. He will probably be crying at this stage but keep patting. When the crying stops then stop the patting. The aim is to get him to fall asleep by himself not pat him off to sleep. If the crying starts again, start patting.
4. If after 15 minutes he has not settled, pick him up give him a cuddle to settle him down (be careful not to rock him off to sleep) then turning him onto his other side (you will need to go around to the other side of the cot) begin the settling again for a further 15 minutes. You can settle for up to one hour, but after that you should offer a drink.
5. Once he is sleeping you can then roll him onto his back and loosen and secure the wrap.
6. Anything under one hour is considered a catnap and you should use the settling techniques to resettle without picking them up first.

6 to 12 months

1. Lie your baby in his cot on his back with his feet to the end of the cot, cover him and say “it’s time to sleep” and leave the room.
2. Wait outside for 2 minutes, he will probably be protesting. After 2, minutes go back into the room and lay him on his side facing away from you to avoid eye contact. Place one hand on his shoulder and with the other hand pat his bottom – repeating “it’s time to sleep". When the crying stops then stop the patting. Be careful not to pat baby off to sleep, the aim is to get him to sleep independently. If after 2 minutes he is still crying, leave the room and wait outside for 4 minutes this time.
3. If baby is still protesting after 4 minutes outside the room, go back in and settle the same way, this time for 4 minutes.
4. Keep increasing the time outside the room and inside the room by 2 minutes each time (2, 4, 6, 8, 10) until you have reached 10 minutes. It is recommended not to leave a baby longer than ten minutes at any time. If after 1 hour of trying your baby has not settled, pick him up, offer a drink and a reassuring cuddle. During the day if baby has not responded get him up and try again next sleep. During the night you will need to persist with the techniques until he is asleep.

Tips on settling the older toddler

1. After the bath have some quiet time. Never over stimulate them at bedtime with rough or loud play. Allow them to have a drink, go to the toilet or put on a clean nappy and then choose a story or two.
2. Set the number of stories to be read before you begin and stick to it, remember you must be in control not your little one.
3. When trying a new routine, perhaps get them a nice new bedtime friend, if they stay in their bed they can have it, but if they get out of bed then let them know that you will take it away.
4. Say good night and leave the room. If they get up just keep putting them back and leaving. If it goes on for too long, let them know that next time they get up you will have to shut the door. Keep in mind that what ever you say you are going to do you need to follow through.

Source: www.huggies.com.my, www.itstimetosleep.com

Bonding Baby Massage

Courtesy of www.goodpregnancyguide.com

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary:
Bonding Baby Massage Pamper your prince or princess with a relaxing rub-down.

Infant massage is excellent for calming colicky and cranky babies, toning their little bodies, and helping them to sleep longer. The skin contact helps baby’s physical development and boosts food absorption.

Baby’s massage checklist:

• There isn’t a right or wrong time to massage baby. You could try before or after a bath, or at bedtime. Just ensure you have some uninterrupted time so you can focus on her and really enjoy her reactions.


• Baby will wriggle and move about when you massage her, so for safety and comfort, place her on the floor on a large and comfortable mat or towel. Make sure it’s clean!


• Turn off any fans or air conditioning. Make sure the room is warm and there’s no draught. We don’t want her to catch a cold.


• Make sure that she’s been fed at least an hour ago to avoid queasiness.


• Wash and clean your hands, remove watches and jewellery and have some oil or lotion ready.

Some really active babies do not really like being restricted in their movements for too long, which is the case with my daughter. When she started crawling, I reduced the massages and soon stopped altogether. I prefer reading as a relaxing, bonding time. But give it a try with your precious one, she may like it.

Step by step massage:

LEGS

1. Place baby on her back and rub some lotion or oil on your palm.


2. Place your palms on baby’s upper thigh and gently “milk” baby’s thigh from hip to feet.


3. Maintain eye contact and talk to her, whilst observing her reactions.


4. Repeat each movement five times, doing the same with the other leg.

HANDS

1. With oil in your palms, start from shoulder to the fingertips, using firm milking movements.


2. Repeat the same movement five times, doing the same with the other arm.

CHEST

1. Rub some oil in your palms.


2. Place your palms on baby’s collarbone. Using firm, gentle movements, criss-cross your palms as you move towards the end of the ribcage.


3. Repeat the movement five times.

TUMMY

1. Rub some oil in your palms.


2. Start massaging from the right side of baby’s abdomen.


3. Move your hands in a circular clockwise motion around the umbilical area.


4. Massage five times.

BACK

1. Place baby on her tummy or on your lap. Rub some oil in your palms.


2. Place your palms over baby’s shoulder. With firm gentle strokes, work downwards along the spine towards the buttocks.


3. Repeat five times.

Once you have finished the massage, cover baby with a towel and rub off excess oil with the towel. Dress her up, and you’re done!

Source: www.huggies.com.my and Asian Parenting Today book.

Reading Rocks!

Courtesy of www.moseleyworld.com

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary of benefits:
Reading to your baby is an activity that serves several purposes. First of all, it's fun! But the benefits beyond that lead to a lifetime of discovery.

Though most kids aren't taught to read until age 5, studies of brain development indicate that the best time to begin reading to children is when they are between the ages of 3 months and 3 years. Experts say children's fundamental language skills are acquired during infancy. An infant's brain grows rapidly between the time she is born and age 4. Active reading, especially when accompanied by sounds, pictures, character voices and physical actions, significantly increases the number and type of neural pathways the brain develops.

Reading is also an ideal way for parents and children to simply take time out to be together. This interaction, in addition to helping children learn about the world around them, creates important bonding time. A study by the Philadelphia-based Commission on Literacy reported that little ones whose caregivers read to them consistently were more emotionally stable and far more likely to achieve academic and work success later in life.

I started reading to my daughter when she was 2 or 3 months old. My parents, my brother and even my own husband were amazed to see me reading to my baby. “It’s not like she understands what you’re saying.” They said to me. It doesn’t matter, I answered. She doesn’t need to understand, I just wanted her to feel comforted by my voice and show her the colorful pictures in the book. I wanted to cultivate a love in reading in her as early as I could, so she would enjoy it in the years to come, just like I did. Now she looked forward to the bedtime reading as much I did. I tried to read to her every night, but being the imperfect mother that I am, I did miss some nights. But it was incredibly satisfying to see her actually wait for me to start reading to her. I felt that I had succeeded in my small mission.

Below are some tips on how to start reading with your child:

• Make reading as interactive and fun as possible, and make reading part of your baby's daily routine - a good time is after meals or before bedtime. For me, the bedtime reading has become a major bonding time. I found that my daughter goes to bed without much protest and falls asleep without too much trouble.


• Hold your baby when you read to him, take time to let him really look at the pictures and be patient when he flips through pages without actually reading. But if you have a more “involved” child like my daughter, she’d prefer to sit on the book itself to get a closer look.


• Point out interesting things on the page, vary your vocal pitch and create character voices.


• Stop reading when it's clear that your baby has had enough. As he grows, he will have a longer attention span - make sure you have plenty of books on hand but that you don't mind reading a favorite one over and over! Or, to keep it cheap, buy one book with many stories like I did i.e. Two Minutes Bedtime Stories.
  
  
  
  

Source: www.huggies.com.my