Play + Learn = Fun, Fun, Fun!

Pneumonia again; and stitches in the head

2011-12-19T00:59:00.000-08:00

My daughter came down withpneumonia again in November and was admitted to the hospital for 4 days. She had had pneumonia for 4 times now sinceshe was born, and she’s only 3 ½ years old. Poor thing. I’ve never beenadmitted to a hospital in my life until I gave birth to her.

It started innocently enough; shedeveloped a mild cough, so did her little brother. But as her brother recovers,hers got worse to the point that she started wheezing. The night before she wasadmitted, she couldn’t sleep (neither could I) because she had troublebreathing and she was already burning up in a fever. Both my husband and I are well versed inpneumonia attacks - as she’s had it 3 times previously – we were pretty sureshe’ll have to be admitted.

Aliah getting the nebulizer treatment in the emergency room

So when the doctor confirmed thatshe needed to be admitted, no one was surprised – except maybe my daughterherself. Luckily we left her brother at day care before coming to the hospital.This time was a little more complicated than before; all previous pneumoniaattacks happened before her brother was born, meaning she was still the onlychild. Now we had to think of who could take care of her brother, as I couldn’twatch both a sick child and monitor a healthy child. My husband could not takeadditional leave days; his job was pretty crazy at the moment. Lucky for us,his parents had just retired a few months ago, so they volunteered to care forthe little guy. But as my son is still breastfeeding at night, so my husbandwould have to pick him up after he leaves work at night. So all four of uscamped out at the hospital for 3 nights; me and my daughter on the bed, and myhusband and my son on a small, travel mattress on the floor. The first night wehad to stay in a four-bedded children’s ward as all single bed wards were full.

My husband left for work around6.30am, so I have to bath both kids, dress them and feed them breakfast whilewaiting for my in-laws to pick up my son for the day. Not an easy feat when oneof them is a healthy child. Luckily all the other beds were empty (all of themgot transferred to other wards during the previous night) so we had the ward toourselves. He managed to spill orange juice, spill a container of cornflakes onthe bed and on the floor, pressed the nurse button several times (I had toapologize embarrassingly to the nurse) and almost tipped over the IV drip stand;all in the stretch of a couple of hours. At the same time, I had to coax mydaughter to take her oral medication and her nebulizer treatment, which she hadto take every 4-5 hours.

We got to transfer to a singlebedded ward on the second day, around 8pm. So the remaining 2 nights we sleptmore fitfully, as we got an extra bed; the travel mattress was left in the bag.On the third day, a fruit basket with a Smurfette arrived for my daughter; myoffice sends fruit baskets to all employees that got hospitalized. The cheerfulfaces were like a ray of sunshine in a rainstorm; both kids were tearing up theplastic covering like crazy. I was smiling to watch them whooping in delight,until my son started playing soccer using the persimmon as a ball. Lucky thepersimmon didn’t crush into pulp under his little feet.

so happy!

All in all, I think kids andhospital just can’t go together, especially when the kid had to be strapped toan IV drip. The bed was pretty confining and TV got boring after a while; I hadto let her watch the Disney Channel to keep her occupied, which kept playingMr. Bean cartoons again and again. Whenever the IV drip was taken off, shebegged to go to the playground at the children’s ward entrance or the smallshop downstairs. I spent some money buying magazines, small toys and variousbiscuits for her, to keep us both from going insane. At first she doesn’t mindthe nebulizer treatments, but later she started acting up and refused to takeit. I had to make it an entertainment for her; sometimes I carried her and wedanced around the bed where the IV line permitted; sometimes I took a few turnsat the nebulizer myself, to be ‘fair’ to her. What a mom wouldn’t do to get herchild healthy again. So on the fourth day when the doctor proclaimed that mydaughter is good to go home, we left as soon as possible, hoping not to comeback to the hospital until next year, at least.

My hopes were short-lived.

It was almost 3 weeks after mydaughter left the hospital. I was doing a full medical checkup at that samehospital. My employer covers a full medical checkup for all employees once inevery three years, and this was my first time. I was waiting for the ultrasoundwhen my maid called. She was new and had just worked with us 2 days after mydaughter left the hospital; she doesn’t understand our language very well, sothere were some communication problems in the beginning, but she was gettingbetter. She told me that she was washing up my daughter (she just pooped) whenmy son came running into the bathroom, slipped and fell down, hitting the backof his head on the door ledge. I didn’t hear my son crying, so I didn’t worrytoo much about it.

I immediately called my husband,asking him to get home and check on our son. He was at a car workshop, luckily nearbyour home. My son seemed perfectly fine despite cutting his head open; he wasalready playing with his sister as usual, he wasn’t even crying anymore. My husbandtook one look, called me and said “I think he’ll need stitches.” I was like “What???”I thought it was like a graze when you fall down on your knees. Since I wasalready at the hospital, my husband packed up the kids, hailed a taxi (our carwas left at the workshop) and came to the hospital to meet me.

I had to cut short my medicalcheckup and postpone to a later date, and went to the emergency room to meetthem. It was already noon, so naturally the kids were getting a little crankyfor their naps. I was a little freaked out to see my boy’s little head cut likethat. The blood was just oozing slightly out of the cut, without any spills. Hedoesn’t seem to be aware of the pain too much; he remembered the pain when somebodytouched his head, or when he lied down on my lap to nurse. Even when the doctorfirst looked at him, he said “He doesn’t seem to be in any pain at all.” But hedid cry when the doctor cleaned his wound and bandaged his head. We had to waitfor the general surgeon for about an hour, to come to stitch him up. While waiting,he jumped around on the sofas, ate some chocolate biscuits and pulled off the headbandage three times. A nurse commented to me, “Weren’t you here a few weeks ago…”I was like, “Yeah yeah, that was my daughter getting pneumonia, now my son cuthis head.”

Aliff in his head bandage

Then the surgeon arrived, lookedat his wound, and asked us whether we would prefer for our son to take thegeneral anesthesia or the local anesthesia. To take general anesthesia, hewould have to be admitted, not eat anything for 6 hours and stay at thehospital at least for one night. I had had enough of hospital wards, so wedecided to take the local anesthesia. I didn’t have the heart to watch my son’shead being stitched up, so my husband stayed with him during the procedure. My daughterwas already asleep in the stroller outside in the waiting room, so I stayedwith her.

But that didn’t stop me fromhearing my son’s cries, which was pretty distressing for me, imagining what hewas going through. I braved myself enough to peek through the door, and I sawhim lying face down on the table, my husband soothing him while holding himdown with a nurse, the doctor on his left side, stitching away. My son waswhining and crying a little, definitely uncomfortable. I was glad that myhusband stayed with him; this was totally different than holding down mydaughter while she was being pricked in the hand for an IV line.

Half an hour passed and myhusband came out, holding the little boy in his arms. He immediately reachedout for me, crying. It was the combination of discomfort, pain, weariness,disorientation and the after effect of the local anesthesia. He doesn’t want tobe put down on his feet, but when he does stand on his own feet, he seemed tosway a little on the spot. I tried showing him my phone to distract him butthen he took my husband’s phone and matched them, saying “same.. same..” Truthbe told, it was rather funny. After getting his meds, we hailed a taxi andscrambled back home. I breastfed my son, and he was asleep within 10 minutes.

Sleeping on his tummy, like I said.

For the first 3 days, he wasstill feeling the pain, so he remembered to sleep on his tummy or on his sideat night. He was even scared to lie down to nurse or to put on his diapers, sowe had to hold his head or put a small bolster pillow underneath his neck tosupport him. On the 4^th day he could already lie down with his headsupported with a soft pillow. Now he’s already forgotten the pain and could puthis head down like normal. Every time he jumps on the sofa or on the bed, we’llremind him that he might fall down and hurt his head again. He’ll remember thepain for 5 seconds, touch his head and continue jumping. Ahh, the blissfulignorance of childhood.

The 2-year mark – Success is Sweet

2011-11-23T23:32:00.001-08:00

That's my little boy. He's reading A Time to Kill - John Grisham.

My little boy turned 2 years old a few weeksago. With that, it’s finally official – I have successfully achieved my goal tobreastfeed him exclusively for 2 years. And let me tell you; success is sweet.

It wasdifficult, at least in the beginning. Breastfeeding did not come naturally tome, like it is for some lucky moms. It was hard, painful work – in the literalsense of word. I was diagnosed with breast abscess when my son was barely twomonths old, and I had incision and drainage (I&D) done, which means mybreast was cut about 4 inches long to drain out the pus, and was not stitchedup, but patched with dressing to let theincision heal from inside out (whatever that means).

Oh,there were a couple other obstacles as well, such as the fridge breaking down,so I had to throw out 50 bags of frozen milk, and the doctor advising me totake medication to stop my milk flow as to let my incision heal. Nothing serious,nothing death-defying.

But youknow what? What doesn’t kill you, can only make you stronger. The hardships I wentthrough made the success even sweeter. You can only appreciate your successproperly when you know how hard it was to get there. After all, you can’t makea rainbow without any rain, right?

In away, breastfeeding an older infant i.e. more than 1 year old is more satisfyingand rewarding. By this time, the bond between the mom and the baby would havebeen cemented that your baby wants to be with you all the time and mom becamethe ultimate comfort, which can be very flattering to the point of annoyance.(Again?? You just fed like, 10 minutes ago!) But believe me, this phase willpass. The time will come when you’ll be the one chasing your kid around,calling out “Hey (put your child’s name here), you want mommy’s milk now?” whilehe’s busy playing ball or building a bricks castle.

The convenienceis nice. When travelling, I just need to bring bottles and formula for my olderdaughter, no milk bottles needed for my son, therefore less space taken up indiaper bags and less time washing up bottles. When he wants milk, I just sitdown somewhere comfortable, keep us properly discreet and there we go. I havebreastfed in zoos – on the tram and during animal shows, during corporate familydays, in the middle of the living room surrounded by relatives during festiveseasons, even in the middle of a futsal tournament, soaking wet and sweatingprofusely. I should have asked my husband to take a photo of us that time, but myface was all red and puffy, it would be too embarrassing even for me to look atit. Heh.

I’vestopped pumping at work now, and supplementing with some fresh milk, as hestill won’t take formula. He doesn’t drink too much milk, but I’m not too worriedas he’s a big eater for such a little guy – you’ll be surprised how much foodcan go into that tiny body – he gets his calcium dose from other sources suchas cheese and broccoli, his favourite vegetable. But as soon as I get home, he’llrun after me, asking to be picked up, and wants his milk immediately, handspatting my breasts. Sometimes I had to let dinner start without me. I keepasking my boy to stop for a while, and we’ll continue ‘milk’ right after I eat.But he’ll mumble and shake his head, and put up his little hand, telling me towait. Huh.

People aretelling me to stop, now that my son is already 2 years old. He’s gettingbigger, taller and heavier for me to hold on my lap. As he feeds, his legsdangled around and his hands would sometimes rub my nose, play with my hairstrands, and pat my chin. Sometimes he smiles as I tickle him, showing hislittle dimple. And I realized how much I love breastfeeding him, and how much Itreasure this bonding time with him, and I just can’t bring myself to wean himoff, at least not yet. Despite the many times he wakes up at night to feed, anddespite the clinginess that I have to sometimes cook while holding him in myother arm, I really LOVE breastfeeding. Needless to say, I’m hooked. And I’llstay hooked until the day he pushes me away and grows up. Sob.

BENEFITS OF A PLAYGROUP

2011-06-16T20:26:00.000-07:00

I’ve been sending my 3 year old daughter, Aliah to a nearby playgroup, ALIMKids, for about 6 months now. The playgroup is held on Saturday mornings, perfect for working parents like me. Despite the belief that playgroups are for stay-at-home parents to be able to get together with other parents with their children in tow, my ultimate reason of sending my daughter to a playgroup is for her to socialize with other kids her age. As she stays at home with her little brother and my maid all week long, I thought it would be good for her social skills, besides the fun things she could do and learn at the playgroup.

As my kids age gap are quite close (their birthdays are 20 months apart), the sibling rivalry is pretty intense i.e. a lot of fighting and bickering and pushing, and of course, bawling. The playgroup actually teaches my daughter to share things, take turns at doing something and learn some manners and the appropriate behavior with her friends. In turn, she teaches her little brother how to share. It’s really funny to see them ‘sharing’ a toy; they weren’t even playing, they just keep passing the toy back and forth to each other!

As a working parent, I have to admit, it’s difficult to find time to do activities with your kids by yourself. Just imagining myself sitting with them, painting and scribbling, gives me a headache. Because they definitely won’t sit down quietly; they’ll bicker over the crayons or paints, or even worse, run around the house and mess up the walls, sofas and the tv! A child may not be allowed to use scissors or make messes at home, but painting, scribbling, cutting, gluing and messes are definitely encouraged at playgroups.

Activities like these are best supervised by parents, but knowing the busy moms nowadays, who would have the time to play all day when you have cleaning and cooking and laundry to do? At playgroups, the playtime is somewhat structured; you sing first, then do some crafts, then you put away the crafts and do some physical play, then finally a group reading. When it’s time for the next activity, the children would clean up to get ready for the next task. For example, when a child wants to keep on colouring, she sees her friends cleaning up and gathering around the teacher to read a book, she quickly cleans up too, not wanting to be left behind. It’s like the children are automatically conscious of their peers, making them want to blend in, do the same things together, conform to each other and work as a team.

It’s kinda funny, but I myself look forward to these Saturday playgroups, which means exclusive bonding time spent with my daughter. This exclusive time is pretty scarce, as both my kids are endlessly fighting for my attention (sounds flattering, I know. But believe me, it’s a lot of headache.). It’s nice to be able to focus on her alone, see her play and sing and scribble. This one hour is also like a break for me from things, stuff, tasks – to do at home.

Here are some of the activities they do at the playgroup, which are mostly group reading, craft play, alphabets, singing and some physical play.

Group reading

Singing and dancing with body movements

Messy crafts such as finger painting

Playhouse

Even birthday celebrations

Making music

Lots and lots of colouring

Ribbon play

A special activity done by ALIMKids – Parachute play

The truth is, I’ve never seen a parachute play before encountering this playgroup. So I feel that it’s worth a brief explanation in itself.

Benefits of Parachute Play

Encourages cooperation, teamwork and creates a group awareness
Non-competitive - Differing abilities and even differing ages are non-issue. It focuses on playing, not winning
Refines perceptual skills - Reinforces turn-taking/ sharing
Develops a sense of rhythm - Requires following directions
Promotes social interaction - Enhances language development
Delightful imaginative play – encouraging role play such as pirates, princess or treasure hunter

Sources:

www.squidoo.com,

www.childcarelounge.com

Finally, graduation!

I highly recommend enrolling your kids to a playgroup like this. It’s a fun and great social environment plus informal learning for your child. It’s also a great bonding experience for you and your child. What’s not to love?

Water Babies - Toddler update

2011-02-09T00:51:00.000-08:00

When teaching your toddler to swim, the 3 most basic things to teach would be:

Blowing bubbles
Going underwater
Floating

Blowing bubbles

When you teach your child to blow bubbles, you’re actually teaching him to blow out the breath while underwater, which is the proper form while actually swimming. People who have never joined a real swimming lesson would say, swim a breaststroke, while holding the breath while being underwater and blow out the breath when the head breaks the water surface (like myself, before I joined a swimming class. See, even a clueless adult can get this wrong). It’s actually the reverse; you take a deep breath, dip your head into the water and blow out your breath in bubbles while underwater.

Firstly, teach your toddler to blow soap bubbles, which is great fun!

Photo courtesy of www.earthhopenetwork.net

Once he’s got the hang of it, you can try and get his face close to the water and blow something across the water, say a boat or a rubber duckie. When he’s comfortable enough, you can show him to blow bubbles underwater. You can demonstrate by taking a deep breath, put the lower half of your face into the water and blow out bubbles.

Photo courtesy of www.iswimemler.com

These gradual steps ease the fear and pressure off your child, while increasing his confidence with water. Most children love to play with water, by getting your head underwater is whole different story.

Going underwater

There are basically 2 ways to go underwater, by holding your breath or by blowing out your breath (duh). In my opinion, blowing out is easier for a child than holding the breath. Some kids simply do not understand how to hold the breath! It’s better if you can make a game out of it, say holding your breath and blow out three candles at once. Or using the earlier example, hold your breath and blow a rubber duckie as far as you can across the pool.

Once he can do this, then you can teach him to hold the breath, while you pour water over his face. Another way is to hold the breath before you pour the water, and blowing out when you actually pour the water. When he masters this, then you can proceed to telling him to hold his breath, and gently dipping him in the water.

Holding the breath is one of the most basic skills needed when one learns to swim. If you have ever enrolled yourself in a swimming lesson or you’ve tried swimming on your own, the first thing you do to swim is hold your breath, head underwater, arms up and straight in front of your head and kick your legs. Teaching your toddler to hold his breath is a preparation for this, sparing him the unfortunate swallowing or inhaling water through the nose or mouth, which can be very painful and traumatic. It could even scare your child off from trying to hold his breath again.

Floating

A basic back float can be a life saver if a child accidentally falls into a pool or a lake. The key to floating on your back is to relax. Fear and panic will definitely bring him down into the water. This is why teaching a baby to float is much easier, because babies are more relaxed and feels comfortable in water, due to their previous water-like surroundings in the mother’s womb.

To ease this fear, you could help your child to float by laying him gently on his back in the pool, with his head resting on your shoulder, one of your hands on his back in the water and your other hand on his chest to make him feel more secure. When he’s confident enough in this position, you could move your hand from his chest and support the back of his head. When he’s relaxed enough, gently let go of your hands.

Okay, time to take a picture!

“Going down to the pool” has become a weekly activity for my kids. Both of them had not started swimming yet, but they certainly enjoy just being in the pool, splashing each other and play ball. My daughter, while wearing arm floats, has started floating on her back, which she practically learned on her own. I was watching my boy when my husband, who was taking photos from the side, called out. I turned around and saw her floating on her own. She has yet to learn to go without the float, though.

And there's my little boy.

Just for fun, watch these videos of my kids in the pool. Sorry about the video quality, it was taken from my 2 MP old camera phone. And please excuse yours truly yelling in the background. A mom just gets too excited sometimes. Heh.

References:

www.suite101.com, www.swimming-techniques-learn.com

Tips on how to boost your breastmilk - my breastfeeding journey

2011-01-27T00:19:00.000-08:00

Before I had my own child, I often thought that breastfeeding is something that comes naturally and easily as breathing. Well, now I know that it is natural, but it is definitely not easy! I thought that the milk would always be there like a water pipe; the baby wants milk, just turn on the faucet, it’ll come out. The baby doesn’t want milk, turn it off and it’s gone. Just like magic. How naïve of me!

My baby boy has turned 14 months old and he’s a fully breastfed baby, despite my contracting breast abscess when he was just 1 month old. I’ve a lot of friends and relatives, even strangers, asking me, “How are you able to produce so much milk?” FYI, I don’t actually get 12 oz at each pumping session. I used to be able to pump about 6 to 8 oz of milk every session, 6 times a day, before my baby turned 6 months old. That means the total milk I produced for the day would be about 36 oz, give or take (this doesn’t include night feedings).

I guess it’s kind of a no-brainer when I tell you, that the best way to boost your breastmilk is by increasing the number of times you pump or breastfeed. The best time to do this is during your maternity leave days when your baby is still young.

I’m telling you this because I’ve learned it the hard way – during my breastfeeding my eldest daughter. She was 14 months old when I decided to wean her off altogether as I was already pregnant with our son. My first breastfeeding journey with my daughter was far from easy. I had started mixing her feedings with formula right from the start. It was a combination of not having enough knowledge plus the influences of the more experienced group – our mothers. My mother, specifically. I had cracked and bleeding nipples right from the start; latch on seemed so difficult!

Breastfeeding was so traumatic that I did not even dare to try breastfeed while lying down at night. I figured that I couldn’t even relax in broad daylight, let alone in the dark at night. So for night feeds, I would get up and prepare formula milk in a bottle for my daughter, only pumping in the morning when I wake up. Nevertheless, my breastmilk dwindled quickly as none were coming out at night for at least 7 or 8 hours.

But I wouldn’t give up entirely. I keep on working on latch on during daytime. When I returned to work after my maternity leave ended, I was pumping 3 to 4 times a day, getting only 2 or 3 oz each time. At times I felt like a total failure, not being able to breastfeed my firstborn child properly. Then sometime during the fourth month, I decided to wing it and give night feeds a go. One night, when my daughter started to cry, I pulled her close while lying on my side and nursed her, just focusing on keeping both of us comfortable. She seemed okay, nursing until she nods off to sleep. From that time onwards, I never woke up to prepare formula again (until I weaned her off, of course).

So when my son was born, I don’t have too much trouble with breastfeeding him. Because the first time with my daughter seemed like torture, at least at first, the second time I breezed through it smoothly. I nursed him for the first time about an hour after the birth, and I had him roomed in with me at the hospital after he was born. The lactation counselor even called me the “expert” breastfeeding mom when I told her that I breastfed my firstborn until she turned a year plus. Yeah, right. She didn’t know how hard it was for me to become that “expert” mom!

But then, this “expert” mom contracted breast abscess. Not very expert of her, huh? The breast abscess itself was a tremendously emotional and physically painful, long story. I’ve already poured my heart and soul on this subject; you could read all about it here.

Like I mentioned before, the single thing you absolutely must do to boost your breast milk is to pump or breastfeed more frequently during your maternity leave. This is the most ideal time, as you have, hopefully, more time to waste on pumping and more time to spend bonding while breastfeeding. The focus at the time would be for you to recover, take care of yourself and the baby, so nobody expects you to do much else.

You need to offer the baby your breast at least every two hours, or every time your baby gives out hunger cues such as crying, turning her head towards you to search for your nipple or any type of restlessness. Don’t limit the suckling time; it’s her food after all! How would you like it if someone takes away your plate while you were eating? Wait until she lets go, or until she’s sound asleep, then break off the latch gently by inserting your little finger into the corner of her mouth. If she normally takes a long time suckling and falling asleep at your breast, lie down, relax, close your eyes and take a nap (you deserve it!).

If you’re too agitated to sleep, or you want to watch a favourite movie or tv show, (moms are nothing if not multi-taskers) first of all, make yourself comfortable. I used to prep myself on a comfortable sofa with lots of pillows with a laptop in front of me so I can surf the Net while nursing. My trick was I nursed my baby using the football hold so I have my hands free to do other things. The football hold was my favourite position in those early days, because it was the easiest latch method for my baby. If I want to watch tv, I would settle myself and the baby in an armchair, with lots of pillows and the remote.

Right after nursing, pump until no more milk comes out. This is what stimulates your breast to produce more milk. Think of this metaphor; imagine you’re at a restaurant eating dinner, and you drink half of your glass of orange juice. The waiter will come and fill up your half empty (or half full, whichever you prefer) glass, right? If you finished the whole glass off, the waiter would fill up the whole glass. The point is, you need to finish off the whole glass, so you can get the waiter to refill up more. So the faster you finish up your glass of orange juice, the faster the waiter refills it for you (this waiter is a very efficient worker).

This is exactly what you’re trying to get your body to do; you need to empty your breasts completely and faster so they can ‘refill’ it back quickly. To summarize this

Source: www.kellymom.com

Here’s the rationale - During the early weeks of the baby’s life, your breasts will usually produce more milk than the baby’s needs. This is the time of engorgement, breast fullness and leaking breasts as they are adjusting their milk production according to your baby’s (or babies, if you have twins or more) actual needs. This is the best time to set the high bar for your milk production. Pump or breastfeed until your breasts are completely empty every 2 hours for the first 2 to 3 months of your baby’s life, and you’ll never have to worry about your milk supply.

Around the 3rd month, your breasts will have regulated their milk production up to the 6th month, and there’ll be another slight dip in your milk output as your baby starts eating solid food.

If you read about my breast abscess experience, you’ll know that my affected breast was producing about 1 oz due to the leak the incision made. You’ll also find out that my mom’s fridge broke down, destroying about 50 bags of my frozen milk stash. It was definitely not an easy time for me.

There are also proven research that shows milk volume or quantity is normally higher in the morning, and the quantity lessens as the day progresses. So it is imperative that you empty your breasts the first thing in the morning. What I do is, I would breastfeed my baby right before I wake up. Then after taking a shower and getting dressed for work, I would pump another 10 to 15 minutes, right before leaving for work. I won’t get much milk as one breast would be almost empty, but the purpose here is to empty both breasts.

When you get to my stage, (my baby is 14 months old now) you’ll be heartbroken to dump 2 to 3 bottles of breastmilk everyday, as you are still producing more than your baby’s needs. I’m used to this, so I no longer get heartbroken. My baby is currently a reverse cycler; he drinks just one bottle of milk during the day and nurses like crazy when I get home from work.

Even though he’s a little small for his age, but he’s eating well and he’s very active, so I’m not too worried (He’s even began to play ball with daddy, a soccer star in the making. I hope). A few weeks back, I threw out about 50 bags of frozen milk, some dating back to 5 months ago. I can actually get by without taking out the frozen stash, but it’s always comforting to know that backup milk is there if and when I need it.

So there it is, the proven method to boost your breastmilk. Pump often in the early days, and you’ll reap the benefits later. So don’t be lazy, get out that pump and get moving!

Reference: www.kellymom.com

Giveaway time!

2010-11-24T00:41:00.000-08:00

I mentioned in my last post that there would be a giveaway for all readers.

I’m giving away an e-book entitled Alphabet of Birds. All you have to do is link up with me at the bottom of this post, and I’ll email you a copy. It’s just a token of appreciation for you guys out there!

This fully illustrated e-book teaches multiple things in a mere 18 pages.

It teaches the alphabet. It teaches association of each letter to a specific species of bird. The best part is the rhyming description of the bird, which makes it more fun to recite and easier to remember.

I used to take Arabic language lessons when I was younger, where remembering the grammar was certainly a mouthful for 9 year-old kid. So the teacher made a rhyming song for it, making it easier for us to remember. During exams, you could hear a low buzzing of voices gently singing the song while answering questions.

Here’s a sampling of the Alphabet of Birds.

I didn’t know half of the birds in here myself! (Ermm does that mean I’m a bad mom? I hope not.)

Have fun reading and singing and learning!

The 1-Year Mark - Breastfeeding beyond the First Year

2010-11-22T01:07:00.000-08:00

My baby boy has just turned one year old on November 6. This means, that I have been fully breastfeeding him for a whole year, yeay! Despite my breast abscess, I did it, double yeay!!
Read about my breast abscess challenges here, here and here.

My breast milk was not as abundant as before, but still more than enough for my little boy’s needs. In addition to the breast abscess, I also survived a sudden two-week nursing strike when he just 6 months old. It was heart-wrenching to see your baby refusing and yelling at your breast, and when you pop in a bottle, he began to suck like there’s no tomorrow. But that’s another story for another day.

Here’s a sneak peek of Aliff’s first birthday party.

That’s Thomas the Tank Engine on top of a 2.5 kg of chocolate moist cake, from Howzat’s Creation. Simply ravishing!

Here’s the birthday boy, accompanied by his lovely mom (ahem).

Ermmm… I’m digressing here.

So, one more year of breastfeeding and pumping to go. More or less. I was thinking to stop pumping when he turns two and just breastfeeding through the nights and weekends only. But then again, one year is a long time, so we’ll see how it goes.

I found this video of breastfeeding moms, which I think is very sweet. It shows of how moms nursing anytime, anywhere, from the Eiffel tower, to the beach, to the Brooklyn bridge, even on top of a mountain! I wish my breastfeeding adventures were as exotic, but I prefer to be a little discreet when nursing. To me, nursing my baby is a private affair so I don’t show it off. Plus, I’m terrified that some skin might show! No way Jose!

This is the only photo of me breastfeeding in a somewhat public place. I was in the car, on the charter ferry in Penang, Malaysia. Our car windows are tinted darker, so the image clarity isn’t too good. But if you strain your eyes just a little bit, you can see me nursing my boy in the passenger seat.

How about you? Come and share your breastfeeding experiences, and link up here. There’ll be an exciting giveaway for everyone who links up, something fun to do with your child. I’ll tell more about this giveaway in my next post, but I’ll give just one clue: Alphabets!

Tips for breastpumping moms

2010-10-07T23:23:00.000-07:00

I’m a Medela PISA user. I’ve been using this pump for my daughter until I got pregnant with our second child, I stopped pumping, and later weaned her from the breast altogether. With the birth of my son, I brought out my trusted breastpump again and I’ve been using it ever since. To be accurate, I’ve been pumping for a total of 23 months, with a few months break in between. The bag is getting a little too worn. I’m just waiting for the straps to snap clean, so I can buy a new bag. (By the way, I have no idea how it got torn that way. It’s not like I was biting them or something.)

For new moms, I would definitely recommend Medela breastpumps. Whether manual or electric, single or double pump, you take your pick. For me, I chose PISA because I intended to use it for all kids, (at present and possibly future kids)I want a heavy duty pump as I’ll be using it A LOT, and I want the complete set with cooler bag and all. But its best feature is the 2-phase expression which closely mimics how a baby breastfeeds. The Stimulation Phase is fast and light sucking to start the milk flowing followed by the Expression Phase which is slow and stronger sucking to deliver milk faster.

It may be one of the priciest breastpumps in the market, but I think it’s a very worthwhile investment. In my case, I’m already making profits!

I’m sure most of us have experienced a sudden drop in the suction strength of the pump. Here are some tips told to me of what to look out for and how to care for the parts, given by the customer service gal in Medela office in KL.

The most common culprit would be defects in the valve head and membranes, like shown the photos below. These would need to be replaced with new ones. This happened to me while disassembling the parts to be washed. I must have pulled it off the breastshield too hard or scrubbed on it too hard while washing.
When you push in the valve head into the breastshield, make sure that it faces outwards or sideways instead of facing you. This could also affect the suction strength. Don’t push it in too hard or it’ll be difficult to remove and you might break it like I did.
When you’re keeping the parts, take care not to roll the adapter wire around the adapter especially at the connector right on the adapter base. My adapter wire was getting all spirally and my pump keeps turning off by itself in the middle of a pumping session, so I had to put something at the adapter base to hold it in place. The adapter is the most expensive part of the breastpump (other than the pump motor, of course) so better not to find a reason to buy a new one.
When you push in your breast shield into the connector, do not push in too hard or too deep like this. Just push it in gently as long as it sticks together, is good enough, like this. This doesn’t actually affect the suction strength, but it’s not very comfortable for the mom. This is because, when you push it in too deep, your nipple could graze the back of the shield as it is pulled further into the shield. Ouch!
When you’re pumping at the office, you don’t actually have to wash your parts every single time you pump. Just put all the parts in a cooler pack or use a closed container and put them in the fridge (my office has a fridge, thank God). For long lasting cool ice packs or dry ice, put them in freezer as soon as you get home from work and only take them out in the morning before you leave. The coolness could last about 12 hours.
Washing is a breeze, I’ve just found out. You don’t even have to sterilize it, as sterilizing could actually tear the soft silicone breastshield. Pour water over them just to clear the milk drops, then put the breastshields, connectors, valve heads and membranes into a container and submerge them in soapy water overnight. Take them out before you go to work in the morning, just wash out the soap, and you’re good to go.
You should wipe the parts – breastshields, connectors, valve heads and membranes - with a clean towel, or if that’s too much trouble, just let it air dry. For the hard-to-reach parts, use a cotton bud. This is to avoid water droplets from getting sucked into the pump motor through the tubing. If your pump is still within its warranty period, Medela would service the motor for you free of charge. But if your warranty has expired, (warranty is for one year only) this would set you back quite a few bucks.

That’s all for now. I’ll update you if I get more tips yah!

Sources:

www.workandpump.com, www.medelabreastfeedingus.com, www.momslittleones.com

Travel toys for babies and toddlers

2010-10-06T02:26:00.000-07:00

We’re going to Penang this weekend for a family gathering.

Photo courtesy of http://www.malaysia-holidays-4u.com/

It’s about a 5-hour drive from KL to Penang, so I was thinking of buying a new toy for each of child to engross them in the car, so I can relax a little a bit without having one of them climbing on my back (the baby) and the other cuddling like a baby in my arms (the big sister).

I was thinking of toys like these for the baby.

Lamaze: Jacque The Peacock

Taf Toys: Infant Car Toy

Taf Toys: Curiosity Cube

For the big sister.

Read & Play: Dress Up Bear Book

Baby Einstein: 365 Days of Baby Einstein Book

Baby Einstein: Pretty Poems and Wonderful Words Lift the Flap Book

All toys from www.mybbstore.com.

If's money is not a problem, I would have bought all of them. But as it is, I'm not a millionaire mom.

Any suggestions, anyone?

Considering cloth diapers?

2010-09-30T02:08:00.000-07:00

Photo courtesy of www.swapmamas.com

Let’s face it, raising a child is expensive, let alone two, three, four children. I’m sure for most parents, the bulk of spending for children would go to formula and diapers. The next bulk of spending would go to others such as childcare, clothing, toys and food.

So wouldn’t you like to save some cents anywhere, so you can spend it on yourself? (Or more clothes or toys for your kids, it’s your choice, really.) But like other methods of saving money, there is always a need of some effort on your side. Trying to save on food and meals? Buy groceries and cook at home. Of course, food preparation and the cleaning afterwards is a pain, but it saves more money than eating out. If you’re tired of the endless mountain of laundry i.e. washing, hanging, drying, folding and ironing, you could always send them straight to a laundry shop. Just pay them, and you’re done. But do this every week for the family’s whole dirty laundry including kids’ clothes, you’ll be broke within the month. Summary: convenience costs money. And it isn’t always the best choice.

So let’s talk about cloth diapers. So what’s good about them?

ComfortPhoto courtesy of www.jardinediapers.com

Cloth diapers are made from natural, breathable fabrics, such as velour, bamboo, microfleece and cotton knits. Did you notice that most kids’ clothing is made from cotton? Why? Because it’s the most comfortable, that’s why! Even disposable diapers are trying to imitate this cloth softness by saying in their adverts, “Cotton-like softness”. And while we’re talking about diapers, what kind of underwear do you wear daily? (Please exclude the late night romps where you wear silk and satin.) Cloth undies, not paper or plastic. ‘Nuff said.

Wallet friendly

A good investment may need an expensive initial cash outlay, but in the long run, is more economical. Cloth diapers may be used again and again, until it basically tears whereas disposables, as the name suggest, is a single-use item. Below is a cost comparison between a cloth diaper, an average price disposable diaper and an expensive disposable diaper, using the assumption for 1 child per family, going through 6 diaper changes in one day for 3 years, the average age where a child is fully toilet trained.

Environmental friendly

Disposable diapers make up the third largest group of waste after newspapers and food & beverage containers, and they take around 200-500 years to decompose. Also, did you notice some small printed instructions at the bottom of the disposable diapers packaging for parents to dump solid waste into the toilet and flush it? I didn’t know it myself, until my first born child was around 7 or 8 months old, informed to me by my mom! (I apologize to you, Mother Earth for my blissful ignorance.) Bearing that in mind, the human poop is thrown into our landfills where it can leach into the groundwater and possibly, spread disease. (Now I’m feeling really guilty. Can you see my face turning red? I could’ve started an epidemic! Oh my God!)

Healthier baby

Back in the days when everyone wears cloth diapers, babies hardly ever gets diaper rash. My mom told me that the diaper rash creams don’t even exist. Like I mentioned earlier, cloth is breathable and keeps a baby cooler. Disposables contain chemicals such as sodium polyacrylate to absorb moisture. As cloth diapers do not have these chemicals, they naturally absorb less. This would mean more diaper change, which is more work for us. But this is a good thing, because of this, babies in cloth diapers are cleaner compared to babies in disposables who end up sitting in their pee longer. Good, right?

Cloth diaper is easier than it used to be

The traditional white cloth “napkin” as my mom used to call them, has to be changed every time the baby pees, as the cloth gets soaking wet. So you can imagine how many cloths does a baby use up every day, around 10 to 20, I guess.

Photo courtesy of www.scientificamerican.com

But the modern cloth diaper has transformed far much better than its predecessor. In defense of cloth diapers, they are softer, cuter and works just like a disposable. They are very easy to use and to care for. You don’t even have to use a clothes brush. Just pour some baby clothes detergent and some water, rub them together or knead on them like you’re kneading bread dough until it’s clean, rinse it and you’re done! If you’re even lazier, just rinse of all the pee and poop under running water, put them in a laundry net (so that your diapers last longer) and wash them in a washing machine like you wash normal clothes.

And most of them are one size diaper now – meaning the cloth diaper is adjustable when the baby grows. Some of them use snap buttons, more are using Velcro for ease of use.

You don’t have to abandon disposable diapers totally. You could still use them in situations where you absolutely do not have the time to wash cloth diapers and where water is not readily accessible such as:

Disaster – floods, earthquakes and such
Emergency – in case of premature birth, accidents etc
Hospital stays – especially if the mom is being hospitalized. I don’t think most dads would want to do any diaper washing. (No offense, dads.)
Vacation or travels – I personally use disposables when travelling because I don’t want to bring dirty diapers around with me, and then needing to wash them when I just got back home, all tired.

I wish I have a nicely organized collection like this.

Photo courtesy of www.clothdiapermalaysia.com

Mine is more like this.
And this.

These are the inserts. A few more were still hanging to dry.

I’ve been using them daily for about 8 months now for both my children, so they were yellowing a little bit. They need a good stripping, and they’ll look as good as new.

I forgot to take photos of my kids wearing cloth diapers. I just have one of my boy wearing it. He was playing with Daddy.

Please excuse the mess at the back. It was a lazy Saturday morning, so cleaning up comes much later.

I bought mine from a good friend from her blog http://simpledimplestore.blogspot.com/. A very good deal indeed. I needed about 30 diapers to go round for 2 kids, so I was just looking for average priced ones. There were a lot more cuter designs at a slightly higher price, go and have a look!

All in all, the cloth diapers have saved me a whole lot of money. As I use disposables only when we go out and travelling, usually on weekends, I buy them about a large pack for each my daughter and my son every 4 or 5 months. But I still use disposables for night use, as I can’t wake up every 2 or 3 hours to check on wet cloth diapers. I’m already lacking sleep. Do that, and I won’t be able to wake up in the morning. Or I can wake up, but I’ll be cranky as hell. And nobody likes a cranky mom.

Sources:

www.diapernet.org

www.zany-zebra.com

www.wisegeek.com

SnapIt Giveaways!

2010-09-23T22:53:00.000-07:00

Great news! For the first time, I’m doing a giveaway for all readers! How to get it? Easy-peasy!

You just need to download the trial version of SnapIt here, try the software and write a review in your blog, forum, Facebook or Twitter. You’ll be entitled for a free license worth $17.99!

After you’ve posted a review, leave a link to your post underneath my post here. Be sure to have your email somewhere visible so I can contact you for a license of your own.

Piece of cake! So whatcha you’re waiting for?

P/S: That's from an animation on MS Excel saying thank you millions of times.. Thanks for reading! :)

Pretty snapshots – just SnapIt!

2010-09-22T22:00:00.000-07:00

I’m currently thinking of decorating/organizing my kids’ bedroom. Technically, they don’t sleep there, but all their stuff i.e. clothes, toys, diapers and everything else is in this room. Right now, all their toys are dumped in one basket that I bought in Ikea.

Oh, that was more than a year ago. Currently, the basket is threatening to burst at the seams from endless number of toys, knick and knacks, plastic spoons, broken trains and alphabets, even my husband’s old hand phone case that you can clip on the belt. I think my maid just dumps everything that the kids play with into the basket, deeming them as ‘toys’.

I would love to have a play room like this. (Note the “I”, not “I’m sure the kids would love this”. We moms do tend to go overboard.)

Or this.

And I would love to organize my overflowing bookshelf from this.

(Please excuse the baby, she doesn't know how she got herself up there.)

To this.
All room inspiration photos from

Oh, you must be wondering how I got those photos nicely clipped. If you look at them carefully, they were snapshot photos. You know, using the Print Screen button on your keyboard and pasting them on a paint file or MS Word. Only I’m using something specialer than that. (I mean more special, of course.)

A few days ago, I got an email from Digeus, Inc asking me to review this software of theirs, called SnapIt. It’s something similar like using the Print Screen button. But the best thing about it is, unlike the Print screen button where you have to paste it on a paint file on MS Word and save it under a new name, it works like a camera, where you just click, and it saves the photo automatically. All you have to do is change the settings at the Properties menu. Very convenient!

You can paste the snapshot in MS Word, Photoshop, or Paint and create a new document or modify it anyway you like. Or, my favourite feature, you can save it as an image file in BMP, GIF, JPEG, PNG or TIFF formats. Pretty cool, eh?

I personally find this software very simple, easy to use and highly convenient. Sometimes I find certain parts or photos in a web page that I would like to save, and I would save the whole page. It does get a little tedious to scroll down particularly long web pages that end forever, which is annoying when I need to find it urgently. Now I can just choose which part I want to save, and click!

I tried snapping it at a video in YouTube and got a crystal clear snapshot.

Want to know more about SnapIt? Go to its website here.

Breast abscess - my own true account

2010-08-26T23:09:00.000-07:00

PART 3 – THE TEST OF FAITH

Photo courtesy of http://www.cartoonstock.com/

The ultimate test came when I found out my mom’s fridge broke down. My frozen milk stash amounted to around 50 bags at the time. I suddenly discovered that they had all thawed to liquid form. I checked on the fish and chicken, they were also soft and wet. My dad had a repairman to check on the fridge, and indeed the 17-year-old fridge had broken down. I was devastated! Luckily I had some fresh, unfrozen milk that I kept in my mini bar fridge, but like I mentioned earlier, my supply was not that much since I was still leaking milk from the incision. I cried my heart out as I dumped them all in the trash. I was praying hard that my current milk supply would be sufficient for my boy. Nevertheless, my husband bought one small can of baby formula, just in case. Oh, and my parents bought a new fridge immediately so I started the all new journey building up my stock all over again.

Another heart breaking discovery – the doctor suggested that I take an injection to stop the milk flow, as my incision seemed unable to heal completely as the leaking milk created blisters in the incision. Furthermore, I had rashes on the area where the plasters met my skin, it became irritated and itchy. I simply couldn’t bring myself to stop and take the injection – my baby was barely two months old. I had been so determined to breastfeed him until he turns two. I was struggling not to drown in self-pity, trying to provide enough food for my baby, take care of my daughter (with lots of help from my parents) and trying to take care of myself. I called up my good friend for moral support and comfort, she even offered her milk stash to me (she was also a breastfeeding mom; thanks so much Ckin, you’re so sweet!) just in case mine was not enough. But above all, I missed my husband, my pillar of strength, the most during this difficult time. He was especially sweet, even though he couldn’t be with me all the time.

Miraculously, after a week and two dressing changes and perseverance with the strength of steel on my part, the doctor told me that the incision had closed and the milk had stopped leaking. There was a long scar, of course, but the blisters were gone. I had no idea how and what happened, but it was a tremendous relief. The doctor even said that I can try to breastfeed again, I just need to be a little careful not to strain the incision too much, as the flesh inside would take longer to heal properly.

After the last dressing change, I finally took a look at the scar. I never looked at it before, because I was too scared to see a gaping hole in my breast and thought that it might traumatize me some more. There it was, the long, dark line widening in the middle where the drainage was done. Mixed emotions washed over me; a little sad that I now had an ugly scar, but proud of myself that I didn’t give up breastfeeding. Sure, it had been a tough journey but I had survived it. I am proud to say that despite the breast abscess, my baby is 100% exclusively breastfed, until now. (Oh, the baby formula still sits unused in the kitchen. I should give it to someone else.)

I did rebuild my milk stash; take a look.

My breast milk is so abundant; it would have been enough if my daughter also feeds on my breast milk. After all, she was also a breastfed baby previously. But she seemed to have grasped the concept that breast milk is for her little brother, so she wouldn’t take it. So I’ve had to throw out a LOT of milk. I can actually get by without using the frozen stash because I’m producing way more than my baby consumes. I’m not showing off here; I guess it’s just a reward for my perseverance. I am so grateful, so thankful that I was able to continue breastfeeding my little boy. So I guess the saying is right – what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.

To moms out there, if I’ve had breast abscess and still managed to breastfeed, you absolutely CAN do it. Sure, it’s not easy. Pumping, washing a LOT of bottles (I have about 40 bottles for my two kids, most of them for storing breast milk), storing and freezing and labeling milk, sorting the milk by the first-in-first-out basis – it’s a lot of tedious work. And the breastfeeding issues such as engorgement, latch on, painful/cracked/bleeding nipple, nipple preference, sore nipples – they can be solved, if you’re willing to work on it and have a little patience. Breast milk is the best gift you can give to your baby, better than a new stroller, new baby cot, new clothes, new toys. I don’t need to tell you the benefits of breast milk, I’m pretty sure you know already them. And best of all, it’s free! Think how much you can save on baby formula, which in turn you can spend on yourself. Ha. Gotcha there.

Photo courtesy of www.zazzle.co.uk

Breast abscess - my own true account

2010-08-26T22:58:00.000-07:00

PART 2 – THE SURGERY & THE AFTER EFFECTS

Photo courtesy of http://www.spotlighthealth.com/

The surgery turned out to be, nothing to be scared of. I have to admit, I was scared as I changed into the gown especially for surgery, lied down on the metal bed, and was pushed to the operation theatre. I was even more scared when they put me underneath all the lights, right next to metal tables where you can see all the medical equipment, just like in House. Then the surgeon told me to relax, as he put a mask over my face. I don’t even remember getting drowsy. The next thing I know, I woke up on the metal table, but all the lights were gone. I don’t feel any different than before and I wondered, is it over? What am I doing here? Then two nurses came over and began pushing my bed to my room, and I saw my husband sitting there watching tv.

The first day after the surgery went by drowsily, as I was still on painkillers. The affected breast was totally wrapped up in bandages which the nurse called dressing, so I could only express milk from my right breast. I was a bit worried because I don’t know how this surgery would affect my milk production, but I know that I still need to express to avoid any more engorgement. I had some milk stash in the freezer and about 10 bottles of unfrozen milk, which I think should be enough to last for my baby until I was discharged. Only the next day a nurse changed the dressing to expose just enough skin and the areola so that I can pump.

The surgeon later told me that the incision was 4 inches long and was quite deep because there was a considerable amount of pus. I shuddered to think I have 4-inch scar on my breast. Oh dear.. In the morning I was due to be discharged, the surgeon gave me more painkillers to knock me out so he could change the dressing. I was discharged in the afternoon after being told I was to come in twice weekly for dressing change.

Photo courtesy of http://www.spotlighthealth.com/

And so, the emotional rollercoaster began. Like I mentioned before, I wasn’t fully healed from the pain of childbirth and hemorrhage, now I have another painful body part to add to the group. Oh, and did I mention that the incision was not stitched up? That was the purpose of the dressing, to absorb all the milk that leaked out, while letting the incision heal by itself from the outside in. Close to the dressing change day, I already smelled like sour milk. Pumping was a pain in the **s. The bandages were quite wide and it covered almost the whole underside of my breast. So, to pump, I have to press the breast shield harder into the breast tissue (which is partially covered with the bandages) in order not to break suction. And, because of the leaking milk, the most I can pump out of my left breast is about 1 oz, which is downright depressing.

In addition to that, I have to be careful not to strain myself and pull at the arm and shoulder muscles, because damn, it hurts. I was too traumatized to try and breastfeed, even from the unaffected right breast, because I was worried that my baby might accidentally knock the bandage with his cute little arms or legs. Even breastfeeding while lying down on my side hurts as it puts pressure on the incision, so I thought I’d just stop breastfeeding for a while and just give him expressed milk in a bottle, hoping to God that he won’t develop nipple preferences for the bottle.

This wasn’t as easy as I thought, especially when it came to night feedings. I didn’t want my milk supply to drop, so I’d have to pump in the wee hours of the morning too. I was pumping about 10 times a day at the time, I was thinking of having the breast shields permanently stuck to my nursing bra. (The only bra I can wear is FabulousMom’s Sarah Sleep Bra, so I bought 4 of them!) Luckily, my husband bought a mini bar fridge to put next to my bed (thanks so much, honey!), so I can easily wake up in the middle of the night and warm up a bottle of milk, instead of going downstairs to the main fridge. So every night before I went to bed, I would prepare at least 3 bottles of milk ready to be warmed up in a jiffy. I would pump before going to bed, wake up to feed him when he cries, then when he’s done and dozed off, I would pump. Instead of breastfeed by demand, I would pump by demand. Same difference, really. I was doing all this on auto-pilot, like a pre-set robot. But robots don’t get tired, whereas I was left exhausted and cranky due to the lack of sleep.

Then there was twice weekly dressing change (which was done painkiller-free), which I totally despised, but totally necessary. So I gritted my teeth and wiped my tears all the way, and butted my head through them all. The doctor would take off the old bandages, clean the incision, poke it here and there, put some ointment on it, cover it up with new bandages and pronounce me good for another week. For the first three weeks, I came out of the doctor’s office with my face tear-streaked, my eyes red and my fists all white because I was clenching them so hard. My husband tried to arrange to come home on every dressing change, but he couldn’t exactly come home twice weekly. So when he couldn’t come with me, he would call me after the doctor visit with words of love and encouragement, which helped a lot.

Breast abscess - my own true account

2010-08-26T22:36:00.000-07:00

Previously I said that I'm saving this story for another day. So here it is. But be warned: this is a rather long post. I've broken the whole story into 3 parts, so take your time. :)

PART 1 – THE DIAGNOSIS

It all started with the all-too-common breast engorgement in the early days after giving birth. Unlike most mothers whose milk “came in” three of four days after birth, my came in right after the birth. This could be due to the reason that I was still breastfeeding my 1-year-old daughter when I discovered I was pregnant for the second time. A few months along the pregnancy, when my daughter was around 14 or 15 months old, I decided to wean her off the breast completely because I was too tired to cope with the night feedings and the pumping.

The first 3 days at the hospital right after the birth of our son, the feedings were going on fine. Maybe because I’d just stop breastfeeding several months before, so I did not have too much problems breastfeeding my son. He seems to be latching on fine, too, that the lactation counselors gave high praises to me as the “expert” breastfeeding mom, though I wouldn’t say that I’m an expert. I had my share of problems too, only it got much better with experience later on.

I spent my confinement days at my parent’s house in Johor Bahru, which is 4 hours away from home. My husband would come and visit us on weekends. I don’t remember exactly when the engorgement started, it was probably the second week after the birth. I had the usual symptoms such as tender lumps, warmth and throbbing, the tightening of the skin, making it hard for my baby to latch on. Also, I came down with fever so many times, I lost count of the number. I tried nursing my baby often, which was challenging because sometimes he just could not latch on! This would usually end up with a) my baby screaming right in front of my nipple, or b) my baby screaming right in front of my nipple and me sweating profusely and almost in tears. Sometimes I just gave up, passed him to my mom and warmed up a bottle of expressed milk.

The engorgement did not disappear. I tried using cabbage leaves. I expressed more times. I tried both hot and cold compresses. I tried hand expression, breast compression and massage. Then one day, I was getting dressed, when I felt a hard lump on the underside of my left breast, which was painful when I pressed my fingers on it and felt warm. I told my mom about it. She told me that she had a lump too, when she was younger. Her gynae told her that it was not cancerous and had it removed in a minor operation. But she said that hers felt nothing like mine; it was small, hard and not painful at all. I was getting worried. I called my husband and he urged me to see a doctor immediately. I didn’t go immediately, but kept on trying to relieve the engorgement by myself. I told myself to wait until the next week.

The next week came and I was still in pain, and keep coming in and out of fevers. Finally I couldn’t ignore it any longer, so my parents took me to a clinic. She asked me to lie down and take off my bra. She took a look at it and said “oh, this looks like breast abscess.” She said the lump was red and swelling, which explained the warmth. She gave me antibiotics and asked me to come back in three days time if the pain had not subsided, in which case she would need to refer me to a surgeon.

This is how an abscess looks. (That's not me, by the way.)

Photo courtesy of www.moondragon.org

Okay, right about then, I was freaked out! I never had any surgery in my life and have been admitted to hospital wards only for childbirth, so you can imagine how I was feeling at the time. After the three days was up, I surrendered to the fact that I had to go and have my breast cut open. The doctor referred me to a surgeon at a specialist hospital. The doctor was an Indian-Muslim gentleman, about my dad’s age and gently told me to admit myself to the hospital ward the next day. He scheduled the surgery which he called incision and drainage for the day after tomorrow, 10 am. I called my husband telling him about the surgery and he promised to come home so he could be with me before the surgery starts.

My mom would have to look after both my kids during the nights I was at the hospital. My mom was not exactly young at 64, and I felt a little guilty that she would have to care for a 20-month old girl and a 1-month old baby boy, knowing that my dad was not much of a help in the middle of the night. My little girl still wakes up at night occasionally in addition to the baby’s night feedings. I told my husband to stay at home so he could take care of my daughter, leaving my mom to care for my son only. But my mom told him to stay at the hospital with me. And I can’t pretend that I wasn’t grateful that my husband was keeping me company at the hospital. It is unbelievably depressing to be lying down in a hospital bed after a surgery all alone.

Apples of my eye

2010-08-18T01:23:00.000-07:00

Hey there!

It’s been a year since my last post. With a toddler and a baby under my belt, I’ve been pretty busy at home & and work. A LOT of things have happened, but I won’t reveal everything in one post because that would make this post extremely, painfully, undeniably long, that people would get an eye strain just trying to get through it.

So, first things first. Here’s the new addition to the family.

This is Aliff at 1 ½ months old. For those of you who can’t tell, he’s a bouncing baby boy. He’s in a pink cot with a pink pillow beside him because those belonged to his sister, Aliah. I bought the blue pillow underneath his head later on to show that he’s a boy, haha. I am so proud to say that he is exclusively breastfed (he’s 9 months old now) despite me contracting breast abscess a month after giving birth.

So my maternity leave was extended because I had a minor operation called incision and drainage to get rid of abscess and was given another month for hospitalization leave. On the bright side, I got to stay home longer with my baby. On the downside, I was in excruciating, multiple pains; I wasn’t fully healed from the pain of childbirth when I contracted the abscess, and I was still experiencing hemorrhage. I was physically exhausted, and I’ve gone through childbirth only twice. Oh well.

In spite of the incision and drainage, the major drop in my milk supply, the breakdown of my mom’s fridge (I already had about 50 bags of frozen milk stash for stock. I had to throw them all out, and start all over again.), which in turn, broke my heart, the excruciating pain of trying to pump from the affected breast and only getting 1 oz, the extremely painful dressing changes twice a week when the doctor cleaned the wound (without painkillers!), the tears that flow, I managed to continue pumping. And when the wound healed, I was able to breastfeed again. But that is another story for another day.

Fast forward to 9 months later, here’s the little boy.

And here they are together, sister and brother. Sitting peacefully on the couch. At the moment. Wearing the new Busha leggings I bought them. Hehe.

Aliah was baffled that I wanted to take photos of her bum! Who can resist such cute bums? Hehe.

I’ll keep it short and sweet today. Brainstorming for ideas here.

Let's go vacationing!

2009-08-05T20:15:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.holidaybabykw.com

Our little family will be going to Langkawi by flight on a 3 days and 2 nights trip, together with my in-laws. Aliah is quite used to car travel, but this will be her first time boarding an airplane, so I am somewhat apprehensive. So I’m writing this to serve as a checklist on my own.

Things to put in her diaper bag

3 or 4 spare diapers
a waterproof changing surface – it’s included in the bag, anyway
at least 2 pairs of clean clothes. Aliah perspires a lot. And she might decide to do a poop job.
Wet wipes
formula dispenser filled with formula (obviously) enough for 3 or 4 feedings. So if the family decides to go shopping right after we check into the hotel, I won’t have to dig into the bag to fill in the dispenser.
at least 2 clean bottles, just in case she wants a feed en route
1 ready to drink formula, just in case she wants a feed immediately
1 full bottle of warm water – she loves water, by the way
A thermos flask. I’m not sure whether we’re allowed to bring liquids through the security gates, but if not, I’ll just throw out the water then.
A bib
Her travel fork & spoon
Several plastic bags for diaper changes or soiled clothes. I love this Diaper Duck Travel Buddy sold at www.mybbstore.com, if you don’t mind spending RM30 on disposable plastic bags. It’s so cute! But I’ll just stick to the free plastic bags for now.
Some snacks – biscuits, sandwiches or maybe some fruit
A toy or two. As she loves to scribble and I prefer not to worry about missing pencils, I bought a small Fisher-Price Doodle Pro that comes with a clip. And maybe I’ll bring her favourite Count and Play book.

Things to put in her own suitcase

Aliah is currently undergoing treatments to cure her newly contracted asthma. So I’m gonna have to bring all her medications, along with some other stuff such as

A thermometer
Baby paracetemol
One of her cold/cough meds, just in case
Diaper rash ointment. She rarely gets diaper rash, but it’s better to be prepared.

All the other stuff is regular things such as

Enough change of day clothes and night clothes. She still vomits every once in a while especially at night, so it never hurt s to bring extra clothes.
Her toiletries, compact size – baby head-to-toe wash, baby powder, toothbrush, her hairbrush and little scrunchie (her hair are so long, they’re getting into her eyes)
Socks and Vicks vapor rub, for night use. It eases her night coughing.
One or two of her favourite pillows
Her blanket, even though she hates it. She usually kicks it off madly when I cover her up.
Her formula and extra bottles
Bottle brush for bottle washing
Antibacterial hand gel
More diapers and wet wipes
Shoes and her newly bought sunglasses. I just can’t resist, they’re so cute!
Her ever useful stroller
Don’t forget the camera!

Have I forgotten anything important here? Hope not. Please let me know it I did.
So I think we’re ready for this vacation. Langkawi, here we come!

Pneumonia and Bronchitis in babies

2009-07-16T01:31:00.001-07:00

Courtesy of www.earaymundo.com

I’ve had a number of sleepless nights for almost two weeks now. It’s because my daughter has been coughing vigorously in her sleep and vomits out milk that she just drank hours ago. (A few days ago, it was rice with fish and some vegetables and bean sprouts. She must have swallowed them whole.) As I’m a rather light sleeper, I’d usually wake up when she starts to cough that kind of deep, belly cough filled with phlegm and mucus, just in case she vomits. Usually I get up from bed and out of the room to get a spare plastic basin for her to vomit in. Or just in the nick of time, like last night, I stopped in the middle of my prayers and put my hand in front of her mouth to catch her vomit, so minimal amount of vomit spills onto her cot. This has happened several times, in bed, in the car or pretty much anytime I noticed her coughing. Yesterday and this morning, I arrived at the office with my hand smelling of vomit.

When this kind coughing spells hit, I would of course, consequently sleep less smoothly. I noticed that my daughter is quite sensitive to certain kind of foods i.e. cold food like puddings cold drinks, oily food like fried fish crackers, even some types of tropical fruit. Her coughing would start that very night after she consumed such foods. Incidentally, she’s quite prone to catch colds and coughs infection, because she goes to a nursery where there are a lot of kids. (This is one very well-known disadvantage of sending your child to a children day-care centre.) It’s unlikely that a day-care centre with two or three caregivers to monitor very strict cleanliness of ten to fifteen toddlers at the same time. And it’s quite certain, that when one kid gets sick, others would get catch the virus pretty quickly.

The diagnosis

My daughter was diagnosed with pneumonia once, when she was around 10 months old and had to be hospitalized for three days. (The doctor asked to stay for another two days, but we politely declined. We promised to give her medicine and all that.) How the pediatrician diagnosed her was pretty much by the text book; he watched how she breathed and listened to her lungs with a stethoscope for her breathing patterns sounds and any abnormality. He mentioned that she breathed more rapidly to take in more oxygen because of the mucus in her lungs. And because babies do not know how to spit out the phlegm, she simply swallows them back into her lungs, causing an infection. After looking at my daughter’s chest x-rays, he confirmed it pneumonia and asked us to register her into the hospital ward.

The symptoms

It all started with the coughing and high fever, which are the main symptoms of pneumonia. She was certainly coughing hard until she usually vomits, and her temperature went up to 41 degree Celsius. Her breathing was quickened, she refuses to drink her milk, sometimes drinking only once a day and she was very weak, she keeps lying down and slept by herself. (If you knew how very hyperactive she is, then you’ll know that this is VERY rare.)

Difference between pneumonia and bronchitis

Bronchitis is an infection of the bronchial tubes. Pneumonia is an infection of the lungs. Bronchitis is a less severe form of pneumonia, but it will develop into pneumonia if left unchecked. Both illnesses have common symptoms and are caused by either these two reasons; bacteria or virus.

Courtesy of www.thingamababy.com

Treatment

If it is caused by virus, the main treatment would be lots of rest and consuming plenty of liquids, to fight dehydration from the rapid breathing and fever. You can try a cool mist humidifier in the room to combat the dryness in the air that’s causing her to cough. (FYI, air-conditioning is very drying, not only to the skin, but also to the throat.)

If it is caused by bacteria like what my daughter had, she was given antibiotics and other medications though a needle in her hand, which is more effective than consuming them orally. She was also give some nasal medication to dry up her runny nose and at times, fitted with an oxygen mask to help ease her breathing. And of course, lots of fluid and rest is essential to any sick child.

Prevention

Some ways of upping her chances to stay healthy are:

Keep her vaccinations up to date as this helps to ward off many illnesses that can lead to pneumonia and bronchitis, such as measles. In Malaysia, taking up chicken pox and pneumococcal vaccines is not part of the normal routine vaccination schedules, but my daughter’s pediatrician did recommend it. It’s more expensive, by the way.
Practicing good hygiene is important too. Frequent hand-washing prevent the spreading of germs and bacteria. But as you probably know, it’s impossible to keep watch on your child every second of the day. Sharing cups, plates and utensils spreads germs easily too, so that’s why kids at day care centres get sick more easily. My point is, try to be clean as humanely possible, but please not to the extent of contracting obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).
Try to maintain the home smoke-free. Ask any person or guests who smokes to do it outside. Studies have shown that children who live around cigarette smoke get sick more frequently and are more susceptible to pneumonia, upper respiratory infections and asthma. What better reason to quit smoking than to have healthy children?
On a personal note, take notice on any factors that could make your child sick, e.g. how eating oily or cold food can start coughing bouts for my daughter. When family members offer such foods, politely decline. This could prove to be difficult too, as my daughter would want to try to eat anything she sees. So if we don’t her to want to eat, better to hide it in the first place.

Although prevention is better, I must say it’s rather impossible to totally keep pneumonia out the door. Babies and young toddlers are highly prone to bronchitis and pneumonia as their immune systems are weak and are still developing. And for me, it’s rather unrealistic to keep tabs on every single food that passes through her little hands. Kids are explorers, after all. So just do your best to protect your child.

Sources: www.babycenter.com, www.gurgle.co.uk, www.tenderbabycare.com

Food fights

2009-07-13T22:04:00.001-07:00

Courtesy of www.veer.com

I sometimes dread weekends when I have stay home with my daughter, like the last one when my husband worked all weekend so I was stuck at home alone with her. It’s not like I don’t like spending time with her, I do, really. My only free time would be when she takes her naps in the morning, which is when I’ll cook the day’s lunch cum dinner, and the afternoon nap, which is when I’ll take a shower, perform my prayers, and finally, take a breather and take a nap myself, or watch a movie as I fold the laundry.

As my daughter just despises being alone, it’s quite difficult to do some housework with her tailing me around and wailing for something she wants to put in her mouth but I won’t let her i.e. talcum powder, my J.Lo sample body lotion, pens, wet wipes, pieces of biscuits she ate this morning, coins if we weren’t careful. The thing is, she knew we wouldn’t let her put stuff in her mouth. Sometimes I catch her in the act and quickly she hides behind the laundry basket, as if I couldn’t see her. And when I take it away from her, she’ll yell herself hoarse like I just tortured her, the baddest mom on the planet. Oooh… this daughter of mine is quite a handful, I tell you.

And that’s not even the main reason why I dread weekends alone with my precious little one. The number one reason is that I simply don’t know what to feed her! No, let me rephrase that. I don’t know WHAT she likes to eat. Every Saturday morning, I’ll flip through the pages of recipe books and magazines that feature food for toddlers and kids to find something that I think she’ll like, but then she’ll eat about three or four spoonfuls, and then pronouncing loudly with a affirmative headshake, “Nanak” which I think means “No thanks, mom, I think I’ve had enough now.” I think I’ve cooked up a pretty decent meal, which in the beginning, she wants to eat so enthusiastically, I would literally hold my breath to see how much she would eat. Not much, it turned out to be. It’s weird how she really likes some food for one day, and then totally hates it the next day. I mean, if you like chicken, you won’t mind eating it often, don’t you?

Then I start to wonder, is my cooking really THAT bad? My husband and brother find them eatable, so what’s the problem here? Her caregivers at her nursery keeps saying that she eats a lot, drinks a lot of milk, pooping twice, sometimes 3 times a day. Every time I pick her up from her nursery, I could really feel her weight from all that food she ate, her little round tummy protruding her t-shirts comfortably well. Then it hit me; she likes company. She always wants a bite of what we’re eating, be it curry, fish, spicy fried chicken or fruits, and she seems to eat more when we’re eating together. So now I try to feed her whatever we eat, as long as it’s not too spicy and not too oily. But her wacky eating behaviours still drive me crazy sometimes. Especially when she purposely drops her food onto the floor (after I just vacuumed the house) or she puts her tongue out and lets her food drip down her chin.

Then of course, I read up some info about toddler nutrition and fussy eaters from the Master of All Sources of Information, the Internet. To my relief, it seems my daughter’s eating habits are perfectly normal for toddlers around the world. The main thing to do for moms is, to stay calm and relax. Easier said than done. Okay, here’s a summary of main points to remember:

Courtesy of www.goodhousekeeping.com

Refusing foods is actually an important sign of growing up, as it is the first ways of how toddlers assert their independence. So even though it may drive you up the wall, it’s a healthy developmental milestone for your child.
If your child is old enough, try to involve him in food decisions. Provide him with a healthy range of options of foods. Chances are, he’ll be more likely to eat food that he chose for himself.
Whenever possible, try to eat together as a family to encourage your child to eat, which is the case with my daughter. She loves company! This is why, I think, she eats more at her nursery. The more, the merrier.
Prepare some finger foods so your child can eat some food by themselves, such as pieces of fruit, vegetables, fish, chicken or potatoes, crackers with cheese or little sausages. Mix them up in a variety of colours to make the meal interesting like, carrots, peas, fish, potatoes and pieces of papaya on a yellow plate. But be ready to brace yourself if your child flips it over to the floor.
If they spit out their food or protest, don’t punish or yell, but try to smile and take away their food and wait for the next mealtime. This is a real challenge for me, especially when she purposely throws her food onto the floor. But I’ll try and paste a smile on my face next time.
Try, try and try again. Just like my daughter’s whims, children’s likes and dislikes change all the time. She might not like it the first time, but she might like them the 15th time. So don’t lose heart too quickly.
Just like us adults, there some things that children just do not want to eat. I don’t eat seafood, bean sprouts and tofu, despite my husband’s saying they are delicious, so who am I to complain? So give in gracefully, and nobody’s left in tears.

If all else fails, just take her plate and chow down the food yourself. At least it doesn’t go to waste.

Get toned with baby (It's possible okay!)

2009-07-10T04:56:00.000-07:00

I came across this website during my first pregnancy, but I really didn't apply it too much with my own daughter, sad to say. So I am giving encouragement to you moms out there to work it out! So at least someone's getting the benefits of from my sharing this.

These exercises are really no brainers, but can be quite effective if you really stick at it. You don't even need dumbells, just hold your baby instead. I can personally guarantee toned arms from carrying your own baby for hours! So come on moms, lets work out a storm! (or least a little sweat, that's good enough too for starters.)

1. Baby Dancing

Holding your baby in your arms or in a front carrier, sway back and forth or dance the cha-cha. Keep your feet moving to gently raise your heart rate. Continue for 5 minutes, working up to 10.

Strengthens heart, legs, hips, arms, shoulders, back and abdominals.

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

2. Cradle Plies

Holding your baby in your arms or in a front carrier, sway back and forth or dance the cha-cha. Keep your feet moving to gently raise your heart rate. Continue for 5 minutes, working up to 10.

Strengthens heart, legs, hips, arms, shoulders, back and abdominals.

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

3. Mommy Squats

Holding your baby to your chest, stand a few inches in front of a couch with your feet hip-width apart and toes pointing straight ahead. With abs drawn in, bend your knees and lower into a semi-squat until your butt is just above the seat cushion [shown]. Return to starting position. Repeat 5 times, building up to 10.

Strengthens legs, hips, glutes, arms and core (abdominal and back muscles).

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

4. Baby Bridges

Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat, toes pointing straight ahead. Place your baby belly-down on your thighs and hold onto her hips or ankles. Keeping your abs tight, slowly lift your hips off the floor while squeezing your glutes [shown]. Lower your hips to the floor. Repeat 5 times, working up to 10.

Strengthenships, glutes, lower back and core.

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

5. Kiss the Baby Push-Ups

On your hands and knees, place your baby on her back, underneath your chest. With your wrists under your shoulders and your head in line with your spine, pull your abs in--your body should form a straight line from head to hips [shown]. Bend your elbows to lower your torso and give your baby a kiss. Push back up to starting position. Repeat 5 times, working up to 15.

Strengthens chest, arms, back and abdominals.

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

6a. Baby Elevators

Sit with your knees bent and ankles crossed. Place your baby on your ankles facing you. Maintaining a straight back, gently lift her toward the ceiling, keeping your elbows slightly bent

[A](shown). Slowly lower your baby toward your chest and give her a kiss

[B] (next slide). Push her back up into the air. Repeat 5 times, working up to 15.

Strengthens chest, back, arms and shoulders.

Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

6b. Baby Elevators

Sit with your knees bent and ankles crossed. Place your baby on your ankles facing you. Maintaining a straight back, gently lift her toward the ceiling, keeping your elbows slightly bent [A](shown). Slowly lower your baby toward your chest and give her a kiss.

Push her back up into the air. Repeat 5 times, working up to 15.

Strengthens chest, back, arms and shoulders.Total time: 15 to 20 minutes

Tips: Keep your abs drawn in and your shoulders back and down during each move. Be sure to cradle your baby's head securely, and don't forget to play and talk with her while you exercise.

Go visit the website, there's tons of useful info for new and old (or should I say, seasoned, moms.) It's a lot of fun!

Source: www.fitpregnancy.com

How to cope with two

2009-07-06T02:01:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.autonomoussource.com

I’m currently 5 and ½ months pregnant, and somewhat apprehensive about the soon-coming of our second baby. Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful for this gift; God must have known that I could handle this. But I’m not so sure! My last pregnancy was 15 months ago, but it couldn’t have felt more different than the first time around. I am much more tired than before, having to put up with Aliah, who’s pretty much still a baby herself. All the tantrums, the mess, the running here and there, I’m left breathless with an aching back most of the time.

My husband surprisingly asked me the other day “Are all babies really this messy? Or is it just our daughter?” after Aliah successfully got herself smeared in rice, fish and crackers. Not to mention the mess within a meter radius around her high chair. No, make that two meters. I was like come on, how can you expect a baby to be clean and tidy all the time, I mean at any time? To babies, mess equals fun! I tried to comfort my husband by saying that in the midst of all the mess, she’s actually learning something. “I don’t care what she’s learning, I just vacuumed the house!” Okay, time to shut up.

But really, we’re both up in our wits to the max, how in the world are we going to handle another bundle of mess-making, tantrum-yelling, poop-producing joy? I simply cannot imagine. Oh, I can imagine the state of the house then, but I can’t imagine how I’m going to keep myself from going insane when I’m already at the verge of insanity and tears.

Okay, okay, you might think that I’m exaggerating this a little. There are millions of people in the world who have more than one child. But it’s little hard to put yourself in someone else’s shoes when you already feel like you’re at the end of your patience most of the time. I mean, parenting is hard work. Literally. I still go through some not-so-smooth-sleep nights now that Aliah’s 15 months old. So how’s it going to be when the baby arrives, won’t I be able to sleep a wink? (Like I’ve mentioned before, sleep is a luxury to tired and energy-starved moms.) Sometimes I can’t even go to the toilet in peace, with Aliah wailing outside the door. (She usually wails in despair whenever she sees me leaving her.) Again, the nervousness and anxiety pops in. Can I be a good mother to both of them? What if I turn out to favour one of them? I’ve already poured so much love into Aliah, will I be able to love them equally?

Then I accidentally came across this article on coping with two and helping siblings to bond in Babycentre UK. It talks about how to prepare your toddler for the baby, how to treat them as individuals and not to compare them, how to teach the older sister or brother to help care and love the younger sibling and of course, that sibling rivalry will happen, to a certain degree. It even mentioned that some experts say that sibling rivalry is an opportunity for our children to learn the skills they’ll need in their future relationships. Have a read, it might put some worries at ease for second-time parents.

As for me, some skepticism still remains. I’ve learned by experience that parenthood is nothing like what’s mentioned in books. But don’t worry too much, it’ll definitely be the greatest adventure you’ll ever have.

Creating the love of learning

2009-07-01T01:44:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.brillbaby.com

Hi peeps!

Sorry for the lack of posts lately, I have been unwell for a few days now, with a runny nose, a bout of flu and watery eyes. My creative juices seemed to be blocked by an invisible barrier. So today I thought I’d just share with you what my colleagues and I discussed about while we went out to buy lunch just now.

It all started with this one colleague with a 15-year old son, who said she was busy editing her son’s science project at work. I was surprised and said “Why didn’t you ask him to print it out, so you can check on paper, and then ask him to correct it himself?” She said she’d told him to print out days ago, to no avail. The project was due tomorrow, so there’s no time for her to double check again, so she just edited it herself. I told her to tell her son about how we survived in our days, where parents were too busy or uneducated enough to be able to help us with our homework. I remembered my mom helping me with painting, doing creative projects or sewing my table runner project, stuff like that. But no help in difficult subjects like maths and science. That was pretty much the only parent intervention in my school life. The rest of it, I had to figure out on my own.

My colleague told me that both her husband and herself had berated him countless of times. She also said that his latest report card was a lot of D’s, C’s and maybe a couple of B’s. Another colleague said that her 13-year old sister failed three subjects in school. She was more interested in singing and dancing projects, even getting frustrated when she failed to score a place in singing or dancing competitions. My own nephew scored some C’s and D’s in his SPM last year, not to mention his smoking in the house, his late nights out and sometimes not coming home at all. I read about a 13-year old boy having a baby with his 14-year old girlfriend a few months ago. I also read an article about teenage girls having more sex to get revenge for their parent’s neglect. (This is a little out of topic, but still, very shocking.) I was like, WHAT in the WORLD is happening here?

Gone are the days of the simple life of friends, school, playing at recess and family fun. It looks like the days of sex, drugs and rock and roll are back with a vengeance; destroy mankind. (Sounds like a Decepticon. Haha.) It’s scary. When I was dropping off my daughter at her nursery the other day, I saw of group of boys and girls in school uniforms cutting classes and idling around the shops. I told my husband, I could count with my fingers, the number of times that I’ve cut classes in school. I felt it was such a loss when I couldn’t go to school, when my classmates get to learn but I missed out. My husband said “Honey, that was 15 years ago. Things are different now.”

How did it get to be so different? I guess parents are the first to be blamed. The world today is so tough and expensive, both parents need to go and work outside the house, to earn sometimes just enough to provide for their family, with a little bit left over to spare. The recession has made it even more difficult; people lost their jobs and struggling hard to survive. Our country was not so badly hit with the recession, but my friends in the UK and US were laid off, some hanging on to their jobs for dear life. I read about families with close bonds would be less likely to have rebellious or difficult kids. But who would have time to spend with kids when they come back at 9 or 10 at night, only to put their kids to bed? (I experienced this too, so I know how it feels.)

My mother told me about how kids today are so pressured to excel in school. When I was in school, kindergarten was like play-school. Standard One students were just learning the alphabets and learning to count. Kids nowadays are expected to be able to read when they enter Standard One, they have private tuitions after school, come back at 7 p.m. and have homework to do. In Standard One, at 7 years old. When will they have time to be kids, to be able to play and have fun freely? But at the same time, we wouldn’t want our children to be the least smart in class, would we? So what can we do, as parents? Push them to strive in studies or let them play to their heart’s content without a care in the world? Is it even possible to achieve a balance? It isn’t as easy as you think it would be, you know.

I guess the best way to go about this matter is, to instill the love of learning in our children, which is not easy, considering our own education system here in Malaysia. Schools, learning and studying should be, first and foremost, FUN. When it’s fun, you don’t even have to force them to learn, I bet kids would be running out the door each morning to go to school! Wouldn’t that be marvelous? I think our education system is too rigid and inflexible, too focused on excelling in exams, too pressured to perform the best in class. There are a lot more other skills that are needed to survive in the real world, like communication skills, presentation skills, problem solving skills, time management skills, even teamwork skills.

Courtesy of www.brillbaby.com

I’ve read more and more of these articles, which seem to be springing before my eyes everyday – educate your child as soon as possible, i.e. from the day she was born. It may seem ridiculous to read or show flashcards to babies who don’t seem to be able to understand anything – except maybe milk and sleep – but in that tiny brain of theirs, miraculous wonders are taking place every second, every day. Have you ever heard the phrase “A baby is born a genius”? Well, it’s true. Children under the age of 5 have the effortless ability to learn and absorb knowledge , when the brain growth is most rapid, compared to school age children, teenagers and much less, adults. So what better time to teach your precious ones other than RIGHT NOW?

I didn’t intend to write so much about this, but I guess I get a little too enthusiastic sometimes. I have some ideas brewing n my head about teaching my daughter new things, but I’ll let you know when I actually have done it. Right now, I need to get my stuffy nose unstuffed first. I’m too drained to do anything but sleep right after dinner. Aliah is now dragging the bedtime book off the shelf (the book is almost as big as her) to get me to read to her. Poor thing.

Alphabet flash cards

2009-06-24T02:58:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.thehipinfant.com

Activity for: Child & Parents

Summary:
Print (or make your own) a set of alphabet flash cards and ideas on how to use them for your childs learning. Make learning fun and your child won't even know that they're learning! Don't you wish all schools are fun like this? Imagine waking up in the morning and you can't wait to go to school. Wouldn't that be great?

Below are a number of ideas of how to use these cards. Remember to adjust each activity according to your child’s age and ability and above all – be positive, patient and give them lots of praise. (Isn't that what parenthood is all about?)

Spell my name

Help you child pick out all the letters in their name and lay them out in order. Go through each letter and make the relevant sounds. Finally, spell the name out loud.

Look at the word

Look at the picture on the front of the card and then write the word on the back of the card. Ask your child to tell you what the picture is. Once they have identified it correctly turn the card over and show them the word. Sound out all the letters in the word.

Pick out the colour

Once your child has coloured in the pictures, ask them to go through and pick out all the pictures that contain a certain colour. Once completed go through the cards and practice identifying the image, letter and sound.

Vowels and Consonants

For the older children, ask them to separate the cards into 2 groups – vowels and consonants. Practice making simple words by picking one vowel and adding some consonants.

Memory

Lay out 3 or 4 cards in a row. Go through the cards together with your child and talk about the letter and image. Ask you child to close their eyes and take one away. See if they can pick the one that’s missing, then it’s your turn.

I Spy

Ask your child to pick a card. Review the letter and the sound it makes. Ask them to find something else in their home that starts with the same letter. It’s easier if you go first so they have an example of what to do. It’ll also help keep their attention if you pick something they love like biscuit, bike, book etc…instead of broccoli.

Cut and Paste

Ask your child to pick out a few of the flash cards. Give them a few old magazines you never had time to read anyway. Help them cut out pictures like the ones they see on the cards as well as pictures of other things that begin with the same letter. Try gluing them into a scrapbook and help them write the letter on the page. You can get great, cheap scrapbooks from your local supermarket.

For starters, check out this sites for free printable flash cards, FileGuru and ESL Flashcards. Loads of choices there. Have fun learning!

Source: www.huggies.com.my

How to save with a baby in tow

2009-06-22T19:48:00.001-07:00

Courtesy of www.economicpopulist.org

I found this article in TheNestBaby a while back, before I had my first daughter. But I’ve modified it a bit with what little experience I have. Let’s face it, having a baby is expensive and can really break the bank, if you splurge on every single thing. (If you’re filthy rich like the Beckhams, who am I to complain? Do as you please, madam.) But most of us, I believe are average or slightly above average income earners, who would to love to spend wisely and save more for that dream house/car/vacation/whatever. Money doesn’t grow from trees, you know. So just have a look at this list, it may be worth a little of your time.

Buy gear and clothes from department stores.

Department stores are often full of great maternity and baby clothes as well as gear and furniture. I bought two maternity jeans at Jusco for RM130 (one jeans and one slim pants) which look like the expensive ones in Modernmum, if you don’t look too closely. I would have considered buying secondhand stuff, but my sister gave us her wooden baby cot and old carseat, so we already saved a lot there.

Borrow a bassinet (or skip it altogether).

Most bassinets can only be used until baby starts rolling over, so try to find one that you can borrow for those few weeks. We didn’t buy any for this same reason. I kinda regretted buying the baby bouncer too, because my daughter used it only until she was 5-6 months old. But we’re gonna use it for the second baby, so that’s ok, I guess.

Hold off.

If you aren’t sure which products will work best for baby (especially with bottles, pacifiers, even diapers), buy the minimum to start with, then stock up once you know baby’s preferences. We tried buying a cheaper brand of diapers, but my daughter developed rashes. So we stashed them away and might try our luck with the next baby.

Limit the tests.

Not pregnant yet? Buy three (and no more than three) pregnancy tests to keep on hand. If you have a larger supply, you’re likely to wind up with a trash can full of them, because like me, I couldn’t quite believe my eyes when I discovered I was pregnant for the second time (it was totally unexpected!). If I had 10 tests, I would’ve used them all up to my heart’s content.

Go easy on the starter diapers.

Start with only one pack of newborn diapers. Baby may not even fit into them at the start, and he’ll grow fast. I wasted an almost full packet of size S diapers because my daughter outgrew them. So I gave them to a friend who just had her baby, at least someone else benefitted from that mistake.

Breastfeed for as long as possible.

Not only breast milk is best for baby, the cost of formula adds up, really. (My main reason to breastfeed is to save money, but the bonding and cuddling is a great bonus.) Even though I didn’t breastfeed exclusively, breast milk makes up about 90% of my daughter’s diet, so we saved A LOT. So when I weaned her off after her first birthday when discovering I was pregnant again, we really felt the cost of formula. But I’m gonna do it all over again in 5 months time, so I’m going to enjoy this break as much as possible.

Pump.

You might need to invest in a good, rather expensive breastpump. But it’s totally worth the money, trouble and time when you see your baby healthier than the formula feeding babies, not needing to buy 5 cans of formula a month, not worrying on your baby’s compatibility to the formula, thus saving on medical costs.

Formula feeding? Ask for samples.

Be sure to head home from the hospital with samples (some now only give them upon request), and ask for samples at each visit to the pediatrician. We got lucky when my daughter’s pediatrician gave us a small can of formula instead of packets of samples. So don’t be shy - it never hurts to ask. Also, sign up as members for several types of formulas, they give you free samples as well. We got even luckier when a friend of mine got a job at Nestle, so I bought lots of formula from her using her staff discount. Yeay!

Buy a convertible crib.

A crib that converts into a toddler bed will definitely save you some cash over the years. We got lucky again here. Like I said earlier, my sister gave to me her old wooden baby cot she bought 12 years ago, complete with a mattress, a set of bedding and cot bumper. They are a little aged of course, but are still in good quality. My daughter sleeps in it until now. Later my brother gave me a travel playpen, and we got an attachable crib for a free gift when we bought the breastpump. So we won’t need to buy any cribs, ever. A real money-saver.

Do your homework!

Research is essential to make sure you know which products give you the most bang for your buck. I spent a lot of time on the Net searching for warehouse sales so I could buy at cheaper prices.

Get mom (or aunt, or MIL…) to babysit.

Family can quickly turn into your most valuable childcare resource. I’m sure grandparents would love to spend some time with their grandchildren too, so this is a win-win situation.

Buy in bulk.

You know you’ll need lots of some things (like wipes, shampoo and baby wash). If you have the storage space, stock up to save cash. Stock up on diapers and formula only when your baby’s suitable to them. During the early days, test out a few brands with your baby until you’re sure she’s compatible to it, in order to avoid waste.

Make your own baby food.

When baby starts to eat solids, toss cooked veggies into the blender with a bit of liquid, and save the meals in ice trays -- the money you’ll save makes it worth the extra effort. I cooked a two or three days batch of chicken and fish porridge to take to her nursery. My daughter never really like the boxed up baby food, anyway.

Forget the comforter.

Since baby won’t actually USE it, it isn’t really necessary. In fact, now my daughter would kick off her blanket when I cover her up. She even takes off her socks when she has the chance. And we have an air conditioner in the room. Now I use the comforter as her mattress padding.

Get crafty.

DIY projects take time, but they save cash, and add fun personal touches. Try making a baby mobile , as it’s pretty easy and it won’t be used for a long time. (You should remove it when the baby can stand up on her own, as you don’t want her to put them in the mouth and get choked, or get tangled up in the strings.) I love Make Baby Stuff, Instructables and Ehow.

Forget the fancy toys.

Baby will be content with smaller price tags or no-brands toys (or spoons, pans, and cardboard boxes, for that matter). Most of the time, parents (like us) are the ones more excited about buying toys for their kids. When we celebrated her first birthday, she got lots of toys too, so that saves a lot.

Go without a changing table.

Changing tables are expensive and can be dangerous, especially if you have a non-stop wiggling baby like mine. Instead, top the dresser with a changing pad and add a few wall shelves for storage. I changed her on our bed until now. But I’ve got to be more watchful so she won’t jump off the bed by accident. Better still, put a mattress or padding on the floor.

Cook.

Eating out, ordering in, and frozen meals can eat up a lot of cash. I try to cook when I’m not too tired, just simple, two-dishes meal. But then I’ll contract my husband to clean up as I’ll be too exhausted, haha.

Search for sales.

Find a product you love? Hold your horses. Shopping around for a better price can help you save enough for future splurges, especially when buying an expensive item that you intend to use for a long time. We spent quite some money for the breastpump, but I intend to use it for all our kids to come. And did I mention that we got a free gift of an attachable crib worth RM600?

Check out online sites.

There are a lot of forums and blogs selling secondhand and gently used baby stuff. Some that I know of are MumCentre Malaysia, Baiboo, SusuIbu and http://tiabarney.blogspot.com/. Some even offer stuff for rent such as Ibu who rents out car seats, travel cots and breastpumps. My friend told me of Toys-4-rent and Playlend for toys that are available for rental.

Get convertible gear.

Like with furniture, items such as a car seat or stroller that grow with baby can prove invaluable, even though you might need to spend a considerable amount up front. Of course, good quality, long wearing stuff are rarely cheap. Unless you know where to look.

Don’t buy lots of shoes.

I know baby shoes are adorable, especially girl shoes. Just for fun, check out Heelarious, they sell soft high heeled shoes for babies 0-6 months of age. Well yeah, they are absolutely cute. But I’d rather spend USD35 on formula and diapers than buying shoes that she can’t even wear to walk! Before baby is walking (and some would argue the same for a while after), shoes won’t really be necessary. Socks will do to keep those tootsies warm.

Take care of your own physical and mental health.

Keeping mommy (and daddy) sane and healthy can help you save on medical expenses. But if your company covers your medical bills like mine does, I guess you can allow yourself go crazy once in a while. In a good way, I mean.

Buy generic and less expensive brands.

Does baby’s label really make a difference? She’ll only be in that onesie for a few months, so resist the urge to splurge. All of my daughter’s clothing cost less than RM20, even the party dresses, cause I bought those at a warehouse sale. Most of her daily day-wear cost around RM5-RM10. You’ll get nice, expensive dresses from grandmas and aunts, don’t worry.

Baby proof.

Prepping your home to prevent accidents can help you save on medical costs (not to mention stress!), even though you’ll take some time to open the drawer or door yourself. But hey, better to be safe than sorry, right?

Get a belly band.

This awesome invention (a stretchy band you wear around your waist) will keep you in your pre-pregnancy pants much longer, saving money on maternity clothes. Check out Belly Belt from MamaParadise.

Wait on the maternity clothes until you really need them.

Ignore the urge to buy maternity clothes just because you’re excited about being pregnant. I could wear my roomier clothes up to 7 months before needing to wear maternity tops, so I didn’t buy a lot. Better still, I bought transitional maternity tops that can be used for breastfeeding so I can still wear them after the birth. Check out these sites for nursing tops, MamaParadise, Butik My-Dreams and FabulousMom.

Save baby’s clothes for future siblings.

This is pretty obvious, isn’t it? So even we get a boy this time, he’ll be wearing pink baby suits and flowery caps, I guess. I’m sure he won’t mind. Unless I show him his baby pictures when he’s older.

Try working from home.

I know lots of moms are able to balance part-time work with caring for baby, and I’d love to be able to do this in the next few years. This way you don’t lose money to childcare AND you bring in some extra earnings. For the time being, I’m working on it.

Get good insurance BEFORE you conceive.

Make sure you know your provider’s policies before getting pregnant, and be absolutely sure that you’re covered -- there are laws against considering pregnancy a "pre-existing condition," but the law contains several loopholes that could hinder your prenatal coverage, particularly if you are switching from one individual plan to another or from a group health plan to an individual plan. I don’t know about this, though. We still haven’t bought any insurance plans yet. But we have plans of doing so, in the near future. Still planning on it.

Lose weight before getting pregnant.

Obesity increases medical expenses and increase risks of complications. Even better, keep fit throughout the pregnancy, so you won’t have to go to slimming centres after the birth to slim down. Think of that as a last, hopefully-not-needed, desperate resort.

Consider cloth diapers.

I really admire moms that can commit to cloth diapers, because I just can’t face all that mountain of laundry. Not only you’ll save a lot, but it’s better for the environment too, as disposable diapers take forever to decompose. But, ermm, I’ll stick to disposables for now.

Donate or sell your toys and old gear.

Help other people save or get a toy they would have never had at cheaper prices, by donating or having a garage sale. Or if you have loads of stuff, you can start your rental service and rake in some cash.

Buy washable nursing pads.

Okay, so the disposable ones aren’t so expensive, but you’ll still save a little.

Make a budget and keep track!

If you’re aware of your spending, you’ll be more likely to cut corners. Easier said than done, though. My corners are so closely shaved sometimes, I could fall under the cheapskate category. I think.

Courtesy of www.newsweek.com

Buy things that last.

This may seem like a no-brainer, but you might be surprised how often you find yourself buying things that are poorly made or disposable. Invest in sturdy stuff that can be handed down from generation to generation (or at least from baby to baby). This is my main principal in buying most baby stuff but I still would not buy the most expensive item in the market. Just a good enough one that can at least last for a few years.

Shop the clearance rack.

This is basically what I do with all my daughter’s clothes. I only buy clothes that are around RM5-RM10. I’d usually buy a few sizes bigger to maximise wear. Some clothes she could only wear properly now because previously we had to fold up her pants so she wouldn’t trip on them. But we saved some RM, that’s the main point.

Get a piggy bank.

I’d prefer another animal, but you get the idea. Toss in your loose change every day, slide in a dollar (or five) now and then, and you just might find yourself with a vacation fund in the near future.

Before you buy it, be sure you NEED IT.

Lots of first-time parents complain about winding up with tons of unused gear and goods. Ask friends and family about their own experience and preference. I got some pretty valuable advice from my mom, mom-in-law and friends. There are plenty of baby checklists available on the Net, but you don’t have to buy all of them, all at once.

Don’t get emotional.

Okay, so this is easier said than done when those pregnancy hormones are running wild, but try not to shop when you’re feeling super sentimental. (This applies to daddies-to-be too.) The excitement can easily lead to over-shopping for baby. Believe me, I’ve been there. We do have some pretty bibs and caps and ribbons that we hardly use. What a pity.

Ask for stuff.

My aunts, cousins and sisters asked me what we might need for the baby, so we don’t end with twos of everything. One that we did have a double is the baby bouncer, which of course, we used only one. We also got another diaper bag exactly like the one we bought, only in different colours. I used one for the nursery, and the other one for weekend outings.

Buy the best diapers you can afford.

The store brand diapers may be less expensive, but you’ll likely save money in the long run by avoiding the cleanups and thrown out clothes that result from cheap diaper mishaps. I used Mamy Poko diapers, which I think are the most expensive in the market, just for night use as they are really absorbent. My daughter can wear it for 12 hours, sometimes more, without leakage and nappy rash.

There you go, tons of ways to save! Do you have any tips and ideas of your own? Come and share them here!

Baby hand prints banner

2009-06-19T00:23:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.make-baby-stuff.com

I haven't tried this out, but it looks so easy and fun to do! Isn't it adorable?

You can hang this in the baby's room, in the living room or make it a birthday decoration. Or turn it into a personalised invitation or card. The possibilities are endless!

Try it out, won't you?

Materials:

Paper - heavier is better (like cardstock) and will last longer but even computer paper will work
Scissors
Hole Punch - you can also poke holes with the scissors instead
Ribbon or String - length depends on how long you want your finished banner to be
Paint - finger paint or other washable paint can be used, but if you are making a banner you'd like to keep for several years, use non-toxic acrylic paint or watercolor paint. When buying acrylic or watercolor paints, look for the AP Certified Non-Toxic seal. Wash baby's hands right away after using the paint and it will come off with a little soap and warm water. However, acrylic paint and professional water color paint (in the tubes, not those cheapie tray of hardened cakes) will permanently mark clothes so be sure to use a smock, bib or have baby paint without a shirt on. Finger paints/washable paints are fine, but over time they will break down and fade so should not be used for keepsake art.

You can either start by stamping baby's hand on sheets of paper (leaving room between to cut out) or you can cut out circles, squares, triangles or hearts in the paper first and then stamp on the shapes. I didn't have time to pre-cut out shapes (my son was ready to go, he loves crafts!) so we just did our hand stamps directly onto big sheets of drawing paper. Once completely dry, we traced an upside down martini glass for the circle shape but you could use glasses, bowls, food containers or large cookie cutters or just freehand shapes like hearts or stars.

Once you have your shapes all ready, use a hole punch to make two holes in your shape, at least an inch apart. Finally, thread your ribbon through the two holes as shown and keep going until your baby hand prints banner garland is complete. Using ribbon (rather than thin string) is ideal because it "holds" the paper circles in place and they don't shift around. You can arrange them overlapping or spread them apart. If you have enough, put two circles back to back so your banner will be double sided and can be hung streamer style across the center of a room. If you don't have enough, you can just hang along a wall.

These are very lightweight and just a bit of tape will hold them up but you could also use tacks and place the tack right through the ribbon for a secure hanging.

Variation Ideas:

For younger babies under the age of one, it may be easier to make a banner out of footprints, as some babies tend to grab at the paint/paper and it may be difficult to get a good clear hand stamp. How many you use depends on how long you want your banner garland to be.

As with all our tutorials, we show the basics as a jumping off point! Some variations of this craft are to use colored paper, cut out the shapes with a pinking shears to have a decorative edge, have older children write and draw on the shapes add "Happy Birthday" letters across the banner in between the handprints, use different shapes other than circles, use foot prints, add glitter or use fabric and do the stamps direct onto fabric with acrylic paint. And so on...have fun getting creative!

Source: www.make-baby-stuff.com

A good night’s sleep is a mom’s luxury

2009-06-17T23:02:00.000-07:00

Aliah at 3 months old. She looked like a boy!

I read a quote somewhere which says “Where there’s a newborn baby, there’s a sleepy mom out there.” Indeed, sleep is no longer a necessity; it’s a luxury, like that special bottle of perfume you buy when you get your annual bonus. Something like that. My daughter did not start sleeping through the night until recently. I was surprised when I woke up in the morning on my own accord and not in the middle of the night because of her cries. Even so, after a week of two of blissful sleep, she starts changing her sleep pattern again, waking up but not wanting milk (when I already prepared a bottle and gave it to her) but she’s just thirsty and wants water. Then she starts babbling and drifts back to sleep on her own.

Oh but that was an easy night. Months before that, there were many nights of torture for both me and my husband. My daughter’s sleep patterns had been a volatile graph right from the start. She has difficulties falling asleep and wakes up too easily. We’ve tried a LOT of ways to get her to sleep e.g. on our bed, in her crib, swaddled in the baby rocker, swaddled in the traditional spring buai, on our laps, on our shoulders, on a full stomach, in a quiet and dark room, in the hall with the tv booming, nurse her to sleep and some others that I can’t remember. She had been sleeping in the spring buai until a few months back recently until I decided to make her fall asleep on her own in her cot (because I was too tired to sit up and swing the buai up and down every time she cries. My arms hurt.)

You know the cry-it-out method to get your baby to sleep? I decided to try it out. After her diaper and night clothing change, her bottle of milk and her reading session, I’ll put her in her cot wide awake with her water bottle. (Sometimes she drinks water from her bottle until she falls asleep.) Then I’ll turn off the lights, give her one last kiss and hug and lie down in my bed beside her cot. Most of the time, she’d still want to continue playing in the dark, throwing her pillows at me, sometimes poking me in the face. I would just ignore her and pretend to sleep (most of the time, I really slept instead of just pretending). I’d hear her babble, walk around her cot, gulping down water and rolling around trying to sleep. It’d take around 30 to 45 minutes, but she did sleep on her own in the end. Voila!

So in case you want to try it out with your baby, here’s the tried and tested way of doing it, from http://www.itstimetosleep.com/. But remember, you know your baby best and the steps are for a guideline only. (I didn't follow every single step either. I just did the best I could.) In the end, you just got to whing it and deal with it.

The Key Steps to Settling Your Baby

Newborn - 6 months
6 to 12 months
Tips on settling the older toddler

The decision to change your baby’s sleeping habits is not one you will make lightly. Generally parents have reached their threshold of exhaustion when they decide to take on the commitment of change.These techniques are not for everyone, there is some crying involved. Some babies will respond immediately to the techniques while others can take up to 3 weeks. Persistence is the key to success as babies learn from repetition.Try to hold this thought – these settling techniques will be no harder than what you are already going through.

The following things should be considered before starting a settling program.

Ensure your baby is well.
Any concerns you might have should be cleared with your doctor before starting.
If your baby becomes unwell during the weeks that you are attempting to get the program to work, stop and start again when they are well.
Make sure you yourself are well. It won’t do either of you any good to be starting a new routine under stress.
Try to keep a fairly free week so you can devote as much time and effort as possible into making the program work. A busy schedule will make it harder to do the techniques with each sleep and take longer to work.
If you have other caregivers, make sure they follow the new routine. This is to ensure that there are no mixed messages being given.
Make sure the cot is well ventilated with no bumpers or pillows.
Remove all toys from the cot. The cot should be designated for sleeping rather than playing.
Have a dim night light so as baby can see their surroundings when they wake.
Make sure your partner is agreeable about the new routine. Even if they don’t wish to be overly involved in the settling, explain to them what it is that you are attempting to do so they can appreciate the added pressure you are under. They too will be great beneficiaries of a child that sleeps well.
If not your partner, try and have a support person to take over for you if need be.

Newborn - 6 months

SIDS and Kids Australia recommend wrapping a baby and sleeping them on their back. We always recommend that all parents follow SIDS guidelines when your baby is asleep. During the program we use a technique of settling a baby on their side, however you should never leave your baby to sleep in this position. Follow these steps to settle your baby:

Courtesy of www.vanillajoy.com

Wrap your baby firmly but not tightly in a lightweight material, cotton or muslin is ideal. This will help him feel secure and take control of his hands, stopping him from catching himself on the face if he flails around. Once baby is sleeping we will then loosen the wrap and roll baby onto their back. Always ensure wrapping is well secured and unable to cover your babies breathing passages. Wrapping is not required after the age of 3 months.
Place him in his cot on his side, facing away from you, and with his feet close to the end of the cot. This is to avoid any eye contact.
Make a note of the time: you’re going to give him 15 minutes to settle. Place one hand on his shoulder and with the other hand pat his bottom. He will probably be crying at this stage but keep patting. When the crying stops then stop the patting. The aim is to get him to fall asleep by himself not pat him off to sleep. If the crying starts again, start patting.
If after 15 minutes he has not settled, pick him up give him a cuddle to settle him down (be careful not to rock him off to sleep) then turning him onto his other side (you will need to go around to the other side of the cot) begin the settling again for a further 15 minutes. You can settle for up to one hour, but after that you should offer a drink.
Once he is sleeping you can then roll him onto his back and loosen and secure the wrap.
Anything under one hour is considered a catnap and you should use the settling techniques to resettle without picking them up first.

6 to 12 months

Lie your baby in his cot on his back with his feet to the end of the cot, cover him and say “it’s time to sleep” and leave the room.
Wait outside for 2 minutes, he will probably be protesting. After 2, minutes go back into the room and lay him on his side facing away from you to avoid eye contact. Place one hand on his shoulder and with the other hand pat his bottom – repeating “it’s time to sleep". When the crying stops then stop the patting. Be careful not to pat baby off to sleep, the aim is to get him to sleep independently. If after 2 minutes he is still crying, leave the room and wait outside for 4 minutes this time.
If baby is still protesting after 4 minutes outside the room, go back in and settle the same way, this time for 4 minutes.
Keep increasing the time outside the room and inside the room by 2 minutes each time (2, 4, 6, 8, 10) until you have reached 10 minutes. It is recommended not to leave a baby longer than ten minutes at any time. If after 1 hour of trying your baby has not settled, pick him up, offer a drink and a reassuring cuddle. During the day if baby has not responded get him up and try again next sleep. During the night you will need to persist with the techniques until he is asleep.

Tips on settling the older toddler

After the bath have some quiet time. Never over stimulate them at bedtime with rough or loud play. Allow them to have a drink, go to the toilet or put on a clean nappy and then choose a story or two.
Set the number of stories to be read before you begin and stick to it, remember you must be in control not your little one.
When trying a new routine, perhaps get them a nice new bedtime friend, if they stay in their bed they can have it, but if they get out of bed then let them know that you will take it away.
Say good night and leave the room. If they get up just keep putting them back and leaving. If it goes on for too long, let them know that next time they get up you will have to shut the door. Keep in mind that what ever you say you are going to do you need to follow through.

Source: www.huggies.com.my, www.itstimetosleep.com

A new accessory to wear: your baby!

2009-06-16T23:05:00.000-07:00

Me wearing my baby in a night street market. She was sleeping despite the noise around.

Yesterday I asked my husband whether we should buy a new twin stroller, as my daughter is still a baby herself when our second child comes in November. He immediately scratched out my suggestion. “Didn’t we get a big stroller for a gift, but we didn’t use it? We can just use that one.” I reminded him flat out that it was too big that once we put it into the back of the car, there was no room for anything else. That was the main reason why I bought…. “The baby carrier! We can just carry her around like we did Aliah until baby gets too heavy. Then Aliah would have outgrown the stroller and we can use it for the baby.” He quickly agreed and the discussion was closed.

I bought the carrier when my daughter was around 6 to 7 months. The big stroller was really too big and bulky to lug around, and she was too small to put into an umbrella stroller, which I think is really meant for older babies. So I surfed around the Net to find some information and the variety of styles and models there are out there. Turns out, there is a LOT of stuff about babywearing. And actually, it’s nothing new. Indonesian women in carry their children in slings of fabric since, I don’t know, the dawn of time, maybe. Aliah’s previous babysitter, who is actually my sister’s maid, carried her in an unsewn batik fabric which she slipped and knotted over her shoulder. Aliah would be cooing from inside the sling and fall asleep contentedly, who is definitely a fussy sleeper. It was amazing! Later I found out that wearing your baby is very beneficial for fussy babies, among many other advantages. Read them on below (from TheBabyWearer.com):

Why babywearing is good for you:-

You can go on doing whatever it is you’re doing (excluding any dangerous activities, of course) e.g. cooking, cleaning, walking at the mall, you get the idea, while providing a stimulating learning environment for your baby, keeping him or her happy and close to you.
Breastfeed hands-free in discreet wherever you are. Some babies feed much better while the mother’s moving around and having the food source close at all times. I haven’t mastered this trick though. Remember I said that my daughter bites and clamps? Yeah.
You can insert some exercise by walking wearing your baby on your body. All that bouncing is sure to lull her to sleep, and the extra weight burns more calories for you. Perfect!
When we go out and my daughter gets sleepy and cranky, I strap her on and she takes around 5-10 minutes to settle down and doze off.
No need to carry any strollers into the car, bus or up a staircase, which is why I bought my carrier in the first place.

Why babywearing is good for your baby:-

Babies cry less. Because they are close to you at all times, they don’t see the need to bawl. Research has shown that babies who are carried cry (on average) 43% less overall and 54% less in the evenings. In cultures where babies are carried almost continuously, babies cry much less than those in non-carrying cultures.
Good for baby’s mental development, as they spend more time in a “quiet, alert state” when carried, which is the ideal state for learning. When carried, your baby sees the world from your view point, instead of the ceiling above his crib or people’s knees from a stroller. This extra stimulation benefits the brain development.
Good for baby’s emotional development, where babies are quickly able to develop a sense of security and trust when carried. They are more likely to be securely attached to their care-givers and often become independent at an earlier age.
Good for baby’s physical development, as babies thrive better when they are in close contact. Your heartbeat, breathing, voice and warmth are familiar surroundings which help newborns adapt faster to life outside the womb.
Good for babies for whose mums are depressed. I personally think it’s good for mums to have their babies so close to you at all times. Babies who are not held need more verbal and physical interaction and eye contact, just to be reassured that you’re there. Carrying your baby is a great way to connect with her without the “burden” of having to interact. Of course, she’ll be right under your nose whenever you feel like kissing and snuggling. Very convenient.

Which one and what style?

They are quite a number of slings, carriers, pouches and wraparounds in the market, just to name a few. They come with a range of prices, from dirt cheap to break-your-bank expensive. For the crafty mamas, make one yourself! It isn’t that difficult and there are many resources on the Net, step-by-step how-to’s, even instruction videos on Youtube. Just to start you off on your search, here’s a comparison chart of different types of carriers, its known advantages and disadvantages.

Courtesy of http://blogs.babycenter.com/momformation/

I bought myself a Kozy Carrier from Peekaroobaby. I like the fact that it’s pretty versatile that you can carry your baby from birth to toddlerhood, on your front, side or back. My favourite position (and my daughter’s too) is the front carry with my daughter facing me. I received a lot of comments while wearing her such as how cute she looks in the carrier, how cute the carrier is, how comfortably content she is, even questions of “Did you make it yourself?” and “where did you buy this?”

One woman who saw me even called her pregnant friend to look at my carrier and said “You should buy this.” Once I was cooking and carried her on my back, and she didn’t make a sound throughout. Only when I’ve finished did I notice that she’s fallen asleep drooling down my back. I would’ve still carried her, if she still wanted to. But since she started walking, she didn’t like to be carried so much like she did before. And she’s gotten much heavier, so I didn’t complain either.

So go on and wear your baby. I guarantee it’ll be your best accessory ever. You won’t need any more necklaces or earrings or bracelets. I think.

A mom needs all the help she can get.

2009-06-11T00:02:00.001-07:00

Courtesy of www.mommytrackd.com

Really. Some moms are sometimes too proud to call for help, thinking herself of superwoman. I watched House on AXN last week (or was it last month? Oh, whatever.) where this lady who is in charge of the hospital and who seems to have a romantic connection with House, (I don’t watch House regularly, so I only know House’s name. Who has the time to watch tv when there’s a household to run??) just adopted a baby. She’s a successful doctor, with a number of degrees decorating her office wall, who’s dressed immaculately. But since becoming a surrogate mom, she finds herself a little flustered (okay, a lot.) and feels her life zooming out of control at times. But then again, doesn’t all moms feel the same way at some point of their lives?

So, the health visitor came to her house to ensure that she’s fit enough to be the surrogate mother of this baby. She was clearly panicked, with calls from the hospital and trying to get her house in order, she hid all the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, put some dirty diapers in the diaper bag and hid the unwashed bottles in the sink. Not to mention her clothes strewn around the house and a mess of papers on the table as she tried to work while minding the baby. She was even more flustered when the health visitor has just stepped into her house for ten minutes and said, okay, you passed the test. He told her not to worry about the mess and she is more qualified to be a mother than most women he had seen. And later, a friend of hers dropped by her house and told her, “Get help. Get a housekeeper. Get someone to cover you when you need to leave the office. You’re not a superwoman, you know. You can’t do it all.”

So you see, even the most successful mom needs help sometimes. Don’t worry, you’re not weak, you’re human. Take up all helpful offers you get. If your mom offers to babysit your baby, accept her offer and take a break from the house. Go watch a movie or take a walk. Or even better, pamper yourself with a manicure. It’s nice to be taken care of when you’re so busy tending to other people’s needs. Remember, a happy mom means a happy baby.

Every mom is multitasking at any given moment, but too much of a good thing is sometimes, well, too much. Sometimes I was doing something, then suddenly some totally urgent, unrelated task, like “I need to buy a packet of diapers after work today!” popped into my mind, and I hurriedly made a note somewhere or put a reminder in my phone. Then when I was going to get back to what I was doing, I have totally forgotten what I was doing. Have this ever happened to you? This seems to happen a lot now that I’m pregnant. Do you know that many pregnant women experienced this forgetful syndrome? So it helps if you can focus on one thing at a time, and oh yeah, catch your breath.

Or use these really cool tools for moms I found here. One of my favourite sites, http://www.mommytrackd.com/ offers free downloads of Tools For the Tired and Time-Starved, which consists of cute, colourful organizers that you can print out, such as Week at a Glance Note, The Balance Sheet (balance between work and home stuff to do, not assets and liabilities) and The Eat Sheet. Read articles from its contributing writers, who are also working moms, about trying to juggle work, family and kids, articles about funny to embarrassing to serious stuff.

Courtesy of www.mommytrackd.com

Another cool tool is from www.cozi.com. It offers online journals, notes, shopping lists, calendars for every member of the family. One tool I really liked is the downloadable screen saver, which looks like multiple frames that display all your photos in your My Pictures folder. Instead of one gigantic photo coming out from the screen, several photos in frames are displayed. Cool huh?

Go and check them out today. And relax, the house is a disaster whether you cleaned it up or not. Let it be for the day, and clean up next week. ;)

Baby Facilities & Nursing Rooms

2009-06-09T20:48:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.parents.com

I thought being a nursing mom, I would be confined at home and unable to go out, as it would be difficult in case my daughter needs to nurse or did a poop job. So I did some research on the Net and found out there are lots of options and facilities available out there! I could buy nursing tops, or nursing covers or go to baby friendly places, where there are baby changing facilities and nursing rooms available. As my daughter was a vicious little milksucker who clamps and bites, I’d rather not make a scene and nurse in public wearing a nursing cover.

I found this list of baby changing facilities and nursing rooms available in shopping centres below at http://www.mumcentremalaysia.com/ but the link doesn’t seem to be working, so I’ll just write them down here. Mind you, I found this list about a year ago, so there might have been any changes in the facilities. Please let me know and I’ll update them accordingly in the list.

The best changing areas I’ve been to were the ones in Isetan KLCC and Parkson Grand, Alamanda, Putrajaya. The one in Isetan was very spacious and clean, with three or four private nursing rooms with doors (Ikano, Ikea, and Jaya Jusco’s nursing rooms use curtains), a big sink for washing, and hot and cold water dispenser complete with drinking cups. The one in Parkson Grand Alamanda wasn’t too bad either, which have two nursing rooms (with curtains).The sink was big enough for our daughter to sit in and for my husband to bath her due to her leaking diaper. They even put a powder container with a puff beside the changing table. Luckily it was stuck permanently, so my daughter couldn’t take it off and cover herself in powder, which is her favourite hobby right now.

So, no fear mommies, you can shop in peace now.

1 Utama Shopping Centre
Old Wing – Foldaway change table located at Lower Ground Floor and 1st Floor of Jaya Jusco

Other services:
Baby strollers are available free of charge at the Information Counter located at Ground Floor, opposite Padini

New Wing - Foldaway changing table located at Ground Floor to 2nd Floor
Other services:

Baby strollers are available free of charge at Ground Floor High Street next to Guess outlet and Prominent next to Burger King

Alamanda Putrajaya
Baby Changing Rooms each equipped with water boiler, baby mattresses, foamed sheets and private nursing rooms

Baby Changing Room in Parkson – 2nd Floor (Children’s department store) equipped with water boiler, warm water, baby mattresses, foamed sheets and private nursing rooms

Other services:
Baby strollers are available at the Customer Service Counter located at the Centre Atrium on the Lower Ground Floor

Bangsar Shopping Centre
Foldaway changing table are available within female washrooms on all levels in both East and West Wings

Bangsar Village I
1st Floor, located by Skywalk, behind Caffe 1920. Equipped with 2 changing stations with mattresses and two private nursing areas

Bangsar Village II
Foldaway changing table located within wheelchair washroom on all levels

Carrefour Subang
Baby care rooms available for feeding and diaper changing

Great Eastern Mall
Located on Ground Floor near Island Shop, equipped with 2 changing stations with mattresses, toilet and 2 private nursing areas

Hartamas Shopping Centre @ Plaza Damas
Nursing Room located on Level 2 equipped with changing station and nursing chair

Ikano Power Centre
Ground Floor – near to Cold Storage
1st Floor – Near to Harvey Norman Furniture
2nd Floor – Near to World of Cartoons

Each baby care room is equipped with 2 changing stations with mattresses and a private nursing area

Ikea
Foldaway changing tables are available within both male and female washrooms located on the Ground Floor near the entrance
Baby Care Room on 1st Floor near café equipped with 2 changing stations with mattresses and a private nursing area

Other services:
Smaland – a supervised play area available for children aged 3-10 years old
Child friendly café with a children’s corner to play or watch TV. Other facilities include highchairs and microwave ovens for warming food. Cereals and baby food are also sold in the café.

Low Yat Plaza
Foldaway changing tables are available within female washroom located at Ground Floor

Mid Valley Megamall
Baby care rooms located within female washrooms on:
Ground Floor – East Wing
1st Floor – North, South & East Wings
2nd Floor – North, South & East Wings

Nursing Rooms are located at Metrojaya on the 2nd Floor and on Ground Floor and 1st Floor of Jaya Jusco

Other services:

Baby strollers and joggers for toddlers are available at the Information Counter located at Centre Court on the Ground Floor

Subang Parade
Mother’s room located on 1st Floor, next to Tumble Tots. Opening hours: 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. daily
Equipped with room attendants, microwaves, individual feeding rooms, diaper changing areas & enclosed play area

Sogo Complex
Changing baby mattresses area available with warm water located at 4th Floor next to Anakku counter

Other services:
Baby strollers are available with a deposit of RM200 and a full refund to be made when the stroller is returned to the Customer Service Counter at Ground Floor

Sungei Wang Plaza
Foldaway changing tables are available within female washroom from Concourse to 6th Floor
Other services:

Baby strollers available free of charge at the Information Counter on the Lower Ground Floor

Sunway Pyramid
Currently undergoing refurbishment. Installing baby changing stations in all male and female washrooms

Other services:
Baby strollers available free of charge at the Concierge Counter by the main entrance on the Ground Floor

Suria KLCC
Parents Room located on Concourse Level equipped with changing mattresses, private nursing rooms and small play area for children. Parent and child toilets are also available.

Changing mattresses are available within female washrooms on Concourse Level, Level 1, Level 2, Level 3 and Level 4 of both Ramlee and Ampang Malls

Baby Care Rooms are also available in Isetan, Parkson Grand and Mothercare on Level 2

Other services:
Baby strollers available at Customer Service Desk, Concourse Level
Rental rates: Free for 1st two hours, RM10 for every subsequent hour

The Curve
Baby Care Room on 1st Floor located near Mothercare equipped with 2 changing stations with mattresses and 2 private nursing areas

Other services:
Baby strollers available at Concierge Desk, Ground Floor

The Mines Shopping Fair
Foldaway changing tables are available within female washroom located at 2nd Floor

Berjaya Times Square
Changing mattresses complete with accessories are available within female washroom located at Level 3, Level 5 and Level 7

Stack & Nest Building Blocks

2009-06-08T23:14:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.mybbstore.com

There are a lot of variations on these stack & nest toys i.e. wooden ones, plastic ones, rings, blocks, cups, just to name a few. It’s good if you can get those classic wooden blocks that will truly stand the test of time, so you can keep it for all your children to come. The stacking and nesting enhances problem solving skills and strengthens the eye-hand coordination.

My daughter’s favorite thing to do with the blocks is swipe at it with her hand so they all come tumbling down. I’d make a funny face, and then she’d laugh. (I tried to take a photo of the blocks still standing, but I wasn’t fast enough. She keeps swiping them down!) I also showed her how to nest them inside each other and she’s beginning to get the ropes. This is another favorite toy of hers and could keep her occupied for some time. Something so simple, yet so enjoyable to little kids. Goes to show that life can be simple after all. To kids, that is.

Here's some choices for you. The one in the picture above is Fisher Price Brilliant Basics Stacking Action Blocks. It's on sale at http://www.mybbstore.com/ for RM35.91.

Courtesy of www.mybbstore.com

The above is Fisher Price Brilliant Basics Stack and Roll Cups, also on sale at http://www.mybbstore.com/ for RM35.91.

Courtesy of www.mybbstore.com

This one is Fisher Price Brilliant Basics Rock A Stack, also on sale at http://www.mybbstore.com/ for RM26.91.

Or if you prefer a cheaper version, go to Ikea!

Courtesy of www.ikea.com.my

MULA Stacking Rings, made of wood and synthetic rubber, for RM29.90.

Courtesy of www.ikea.com.my

MULA Building Beakers, made of plastic and synthetic rubber, for RM6.90. (Perfect for cheapskates like me.)

Water Babies

2009-06-07T18:53:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.boohoobaby.co.uk

Summary:

Take your baby for a swim and see her natural swimming instincts.

Most babies (and toddlers and kids) love water. My daughter surely does! Even after I bring her out of the bath tub, she’ll want to get back in again and screams her head off when I bundle her up in her towel. For me, I started going to swimming pools since I was 8 or 9 years old. I learned how to swim when I was 11, without any formal training or classes. So my “techniques” are non-standard, so to say. I’ve enrolled myself in adult swimming lessons to get my techniques right but falling pregnant before I could get to freestyle and my ultimate dream, the butterfly stroke. There are no swimming lessons available for pregnant moms in Malaysia, or at least none that I know of, so I had to quit.

I would love to pass my love of the water to my daughter, but baby swimming lessons are scarce here or possibly non-existent, so I read up on the internet. Some of the well researched benefits are:

Early swimmers perform better on tests of social, academic, motor and personality developments.
Water offers a multi-sensory stimulation involving all senses i.e. touch, hearing, taste, sight and smell. The intense physical and eye contact with parents offer quality stimulation, which means excellent for parent and baby bonding.
Swimming allows babies to move independently and weightlessly through water long before they can walk, aiding muscle development, coordination and balance, lung capacity, stamina and the brain.
Early swimming helps develops babies’ personalities. Cautious babies learn to accept risk while boisterous babies learn to be more prudent.
As a result of all this, their independence and self confidence will increase.
A safeguard against water accidents. No amount of swimming lessons could guarantee a safeguard against drowning, but at least it would increase her survival skills in her times of need.

When to start taking your baby for a swim

It really depends on your own comfort, availability to a pool and your baby’s health. My daughter was terrified of the water until she was around 4 to 5 months when she really began to enjoy herself during bath time. I could tell by the serene look on her face, her quiet cooing and of course, the lack of cries and screams. Then she kept getting colds and a runny nose, so I kept postponing our trip to the pool. We finally got to take her for her first swim in our apartment baby pool in the morning, in order to avoid the noisy crowds in the late afternoons.

What to take with you

If you’re taking your baby to your condo’s pool like me, you can just bring a towel, as you can deal with everything else at home. But if you’re going to a public pool, you should bring pretty much the same things you bring with you during an outing such as:

A bottle of formula and some snacks for after swimming – swimming makes babies hungry just as they make you hungry
A towel or a toweling dressing gown (if you have one)
Water or bath toys such as balls, rubber duckies, plastic turtles or boats etc.
Don’t forget your diaper bag.

Have fun!

Let your baby splash & play with her toys. Throw one across the pool and “zoom” her through the water to get it.
Put your mouth under water and show your baby how to blow bubbles. This is an important lesson for babies to learn, as they can't inhale water if they are blowing. For young babies, blow a toy across the water and get him to blow it back, or at least mimic you blowing.
When he can sit up, usually at around six months, sit your baby on the side of the pool and lift him down into the water with a splash. Do it with older siblings and you’re guaranteed a few laughs and cackles!
Lay him on his back with his head resting on your shoulder and encourage him to kick his legs. My daughter instinctively starts to kick her legs about when in the water, even dipping her head a few times and gasping. Be careful not to let your baby swallow too much water, though.

Precautions

Make sure the weather’s not too cold. It’s unlikely you can get a heated swimming pool just at the right temperature here in Kuala Lumpur, so try to take your baby in the morning before it gets too hot, or in the late afternoon.
As soon as your baby starts to shiver, get him out of the pool and wrap him up warmly. Babies and young toddlers can only stand about 15-30 minutes before they start to shiver, so be watchful.
Never EVER leave your baby unattended, or even let go of your hand of her, not even for a second. This is especially important if your baby is already mobile i.e. crawling or able to turn over on her own.

Take a look at my daughter in action. She's having the time of her life!

Playing ball with a friend.

Keep those legs kicking!

See what I mean? Time of her life!

Now she knows water can get into her ears, hehe.. .

All in all, she had a blast! I ended up with a sore back, though, from all that bending over. Next time I'll bring her baby float.

References:

www.babycentre.co.uk
www.babyswimming.com
www.splashnswim.co.uk
http://www.dbbss.co.uk

A Tribute to my Mom

2009-06-05T02:23:00.000-07:00

Mom and her three girls. That's me in pink.

During my childhood and teenage years, for as long as I can remember, my mother was always at home. She told me that she worked as a kindergarten teacher briefly until she had my eldest sister. She chose to stay home and raise her children herself because she couldn’t bear the thought of her children in other people’s care. My father was a busy man, and as his main office was two hours away from our home, we normally see him on weekends. My mother practically raised us single handedly by herself.

I remembered reading a quote somewhere, “A mother never stops being a mother.” Now being a mother myself, I understand now why my mother worries so much for her kids, which are no longer kids, mind you. But there are some things that I admire about her, several sides of her that I wish I had taken after, but sadly didn’t.

All her children except my youngest brother went to boarding schools, so we were pretty independent teenagers for our age. But that never stopped her from constantly mothering us, especially me, because my school was about ten minutes from home. I wasn’t allowed to go home every weekend, so she came every weekend without fail, bringing me home-cooked meals, washing my dirty laundry, sending them back to me nicely folded and ironed. Even when she couldn’t come, she would send my older brother to send my food stocks. When she had extra time, she would even cook up extra food enough to feed my whole dorm. Needless to say, my whole dorm and class were so used to seeing my mother, they knew her by face.

The nag of the house is reversed in our home. My mother doesn’t nag. My father does. But as you probably know, people don’t listen to nags. Their voices tend to drift into one ear and come out the other without you even registering what they say and you just go “Emmm. Ahh… Okay.” That was my father’s voice’s effect on us. But my mother never scolds, at least in my memory; I don’t remember her scolding me, ever. But she would speak in quiet, disappointed tones that would make your heart go thud, right down to your feet. She would say it just once. But it was far more powerful than any yells, screams and nags and has immediate effect. That was her way of enlightening and educating us.

When I started working, my first job was as an auditor, which means absurdly long work hours. I was staying in a big, intimidating city with my cousin. My work required me to travel a lot, mostly to clients’ places around the city. When I needed to work late, I would usually continue working in the office, where there would still be a number of people working until the wee hours of the morning. There were a few times that I did an all-nighter i.e. working straight to 6 a.m., go home, take a shower and put on fresh clothes, and go back to the office. When I think back to those times, I think I must be crazy to enslave myself to work that way. It doesn’t even pay me all that much!

Courtesy of http://parenting.preschoolrock.com

How does my mother come into the picture? My mother calls me every night, without fail, to make sure I have arrived safely at home. I think during those two years I was an auditor, she was worried sick for me. There came times when I just had to lie, knowing she would worry too much if she knew I was still working at unearthly hours. Sometimes she would call when I was hard at work in the main “aquarium”, the main working area where it was all rowdy and loud with auditors. Then I would run to the partner’s toilet and close myself inside and tell her, yes mom, I’m safe and sound at home. Sometimes she calls during my late night drinks with other colleagues at stalls. Then I would yell to any friend whose car parked the closest to us “Give me your keys!” and jump inside her or his car for a few minutes, and again, lie through my teeth. This scenario was pretty popular with my friends, and they never forgot it even after I’ve left my audit job.

Now a mom myself, I understand and appreciate my mother more than ever before. Now when I go back to their home, I wondered how my mother held herself together, being a full-time stay-at-home mother. I am running around breathless with one toddler, who is driving me insane, trying to be a good mother, wife and employee all at the same time. How did she manage five? Nothing more than motherly love and patience, no doubt.

I wish that I could say I inherited her amazing patience, but I didn't. (What a drag.) But I must say that being a mother has extended my patience limit by a whole lot, as I am definitely not a patient person. Even so, my patience is stretched to the limit a lot, and I do lose my temper sometimes with my bundle of joy. But not my mother, no. The phrase “patience is a virtue” must have originated from her. She's more patient with my daughter than I am. (Ermm...I hope this doesn't make me a bad mother.)

So here's to you, mom. Love you more than ever.

The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.-W. R. Wallace

Baby signing in progress

2009-06-04T20:15:00.000-07:00

Have you tried signing with your baby yet? If your baby is around 8 to 10 months old, you could show a few signs now. It’ll take some time for your baby to really master it, but it is so satisfying to actually see your baby signing back. You’ll feel so proud and feel like your baby is the smartest baby in the world! Read my previous entry for some guidelines:

http://funplaynlearn.blogspot.com/2009/05/signing-for-little-ones.html

Here’s some photos of my 14-month old, Aliah signing sleep and milk, her most used sign. The milk sign is done by clenching and unclenching the fingers into a fist, like the action of milking a cow. But of course, I can’t show that in one picture. Here, she’s clenching her fingers.

This is sleep, obviously.

Okay Aliah, it's bedtime!

This morning in the car, en route to her nursery, she pointed at her backpack and made the milk sign. (She just had a bottle before leaving the house, so I didn’t prepare extra bottles.) So when I didn’t give her a bottle, she naturally protested i.e. yell. Then my husband decided to teach a new sign “Patient” as in be patient, dear. He rubbed his hand vertically on his chest. I took Aliah’s hand and rubbed it up and down her own chest. I laughed and said, rub it a little further down (to the tummy) and we’ll think she’s hungry.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

2009-06-04T03:26:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.istockphoto.com

My husband has some rashes on his feet and puts some topical cream on it to cool it off and stop the itching. The funny thing is, my daughter seems very interested watching him putting cream on it. She looks at it closely and even wants to touch it. My husband moves his leg right and left, and still she follows diligently, trying to touch it. This would be mainly due to the curiosity that is present in every kid. We keep laughing to see her concentration on the matter, just like a CSI agent dissecting a victim’s body on AXN. We keep asking her, “Do you want to be a doctor when you grow up?”

I thought nothing much about it until a few days later, while I was at work, doing some mundane stuff that’s got me to the point of puking. My job never seems so bleak and monotonous. I wish I could say I love my job and enjoy doing what I do, but I’m sad to say that I don’t. Wouldn’t it be nice to be doing something you really love and get paid to do it? Being the good girl that I am, I followed my dad’s advice and studied accountancy instead of following my heart’s passion, which is writing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying accountancy is not a good profession, I just think it doesn’t suit me. I wish I had taken up creative writing or journalism. But I can’t just abandon everything; I mean, my job at least gives good benefits. The least I can do now is pour my heart and soul into another outlet i.e. HERE. Maybe something good may come out of this.

So what do you want for your child? To be a lawyer, architect, lecturer, doctor, general manager? These are all noble professions, but why don’t you let them decide for themselves? For me, as a mother, I would give my children options, ask them what they really want to do, harness their skills the right way and let them be. As long as it is not against the religion and it’s legal, a clean and honest living is all I wish for them. So what if she loves to bake, sew or make crafts? I know lots of people that make more money than I am by baking, sewing and making jewellery. I just hope she doesn’t sing too well though. I really don’t want her to take too much liking to Akademi Fantasia or Mentor, or things like that.
Courtesy of www.blisstree.com

And while you’re thinking about what you want your child to be when they grow up, what about you? Are you who you wanna be?

I notice that people here in Malaysia puts too much emphasize on money, and not passion. I guess we don’t really have a choice. Or do we? Do you think that our parents would have approved if you had wanted to take up painting and be a professional artist? The first thing they would say is, “Do you know how hard it is to make it as an artist? It doesn’t pay much, either.”

Well, times have changed. It is now possible to combine both business and pleasure. Why don’t you go and ask that goreng pisang seller in front of your house how much he makes in a month? Quite a lot more than I do, that much I know. So why am I cracking my head and stay back late in the office, while they spend 4 to 5 hours a day, and are richer than me? I ask myself that question everyday, but like most people, I am afraid to take the plunge. I am too comfortable in where I am now to make too much drastic changes in my life. I really hope this would change in the near future, because I can’t bear to do this same work everyday for the next 20 years.

Take a listen to this song. Listen to its words, which for me, really hits home. (Tom Welling is really cute, by the way. Haha.)

As for me, I’ll keep on writing as long as my words still flow.

Toys for 12 to 18 months

2009-06-03T00:50:00.000-07:00

Aliah with TWO toys; one is the baby walker which we bought when she's already walking, and the other is her grandma's lipstick. She's combining fashion with play. Good gal.

Your toddler is really taking off these days -- and as you chase your little runaway down the street yet again, you may miss the days before she learned to use her legs so well. "Active" is the best way to describe her now, and she likes any toy or game that allows her to throw her whole self into it -- balls, swings and little climbing frames to name a few.

Her hands are becoming more coordinated, too, and she can now use shape sorters more efficiently, build even bigger block towers, and scribble a drawing. Her play involves lots of experimentation, such as "What happens if I drop this ball?" or "What happens if pull this lever?" She's very interested in the consequences of her actions, and because her memory isn't well developed she won't tire of repetition. Toddlers also like to try out what they see adults doing, so look for toys that imitate daily life.

Push and pull toys: Heavily weighted push toys can give your beginner something to lean on as she motors around your home. Pull toys are great for more advanced walkers who can look behind them as they move forward: ones that flap, bob up and down, squeak or in any other way catch attention are favourites. (Like the one in the picture)

Sorting and nesting toys: Toddlers love to sort, stack, unsort, unstack, and basically reorganise their lives. Sorting and nesting toys are great fun for those who are trying out their early problem-solving skills.

Climbing frame: A small climbing frame can give your toddler a safe place to climb, hide, slide, and practice all her emerging motor skills -- over and over again. But they can also be pricey and are quickly outgrown. Or you can let him climb your grilled door for free. (Just kidding.)

Balls: Any ball that's easy to grasp will be a hit with this group -- underinflated beach balls, tennis balls, cloth balls. Stay away from foam balls that could end up as a mouthful. This is the age at which you can introduce your child to "catch". Start slowly -- she'll begin to get the back-and-forth rhythm with some practice.

Washable crayons and paper: Let the scribbling begin! Hand your toddler no more than a couple of crayons at a time -- you don't want to overwhelm her -- and tape the paper to the floor so she can make her mark without dragging the paper along with her.

Ride-on vehicles: This mode of locomotion may be even more popular than walking. Many small ride-on toys have handles for an adult to push when the child gets tired. Avoid the electronic versions -- they're expensive and take away from the fun of getting around under your own power.

Tool bench or toy kitchen: Fix-it kids or aspiring chefs will get hours of play out of plastic or wooden models scaled to their size. Toys like these give a child a chance to emulate the things he sees adults doing, and they'll continue to hold his interest for several months as his play gets more sophisticated. Check this one out at http://www.mytoysandbooks.com. I wish I had this for a kid. (Maybe I would've been a better cook, ;)

Picture books: Your toddler will enjoy more advanced picture books showing familiar objects and activities. She may also start to take pride in her own library and the chance to pick out a favourite for you to read.

Source: www.babycentre.co.uk

Enjoy being pregnant!

2009-06-01T19:10:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.fotosearch.com

As you may know, I am currently 4 months pregnant with my second child, with my 14-month old daughter currently in the very active age. So this second pregnancy was very challenging, exhausting and wearing, mentally and physically. Which is rather disappointing, because I had such a great pregnancy the first time around. It was, in some ways, even better than the honeymoon period, it was such a blast of 9 months of my life!

So I wrote this article to remind myself, and all the pregnant moms out there, no matter whether you’re on your first, second or ninth pregnancy, how lucky and how indefinitely blessed we are, in this wonderfully life-changing time of our lives. A God’s miracle is taking place inside your own body, how’s that for life-changing?

7 reasons to be glad you’re pregnant

I have several friends that have been married for some years and still do not have children. Despite my complaints of tiredness, bouts of headaches, excessive wind, never-ending backaches and lack of sleep, I remind myself daily that there many women in the world that are unable to bear children for some reason, that would be so glad to have my complaints, just once in their lifetime. Holding your own baby for the first time, after fighting your blood, sweat and tears, was by far, the best miracle in my life.
I have always been a weight conscious person in my life, which is also one reason why I work out a lot. As I love to eat (what woman doesn’t?), I need to work out a lot to keep fit and avoid being fat and sluggish. Being pregnant is like a new revelation to me. What better excuse do you need to binge your heart out than “I’m pregnant”? All those cravings for chocolates, ice cream, cheesy nachos, your favourite nasi lemak and fried chicken because “I just feel like it.” This is the time your husband will definitely pamper you with whatever you want to eat. Of course, it’s nice if you maintain a healthy diet and all that. But come on, mommies, ‘fess up. Any of you craving for a Caesar salad? I don’t think so. So seize the day, mommies!
Talking about husbands pampering, your body will undergo a series of changes that you would never dream yourself of experiencing. Besides the obviously expanding belly, other parts of your body expand too, namely your waistline, your breasts, your butt and of course, the appearance of the inevitable stretch marks. Don’t be too worried about the stretch marks, though. Your husband will be too fascinated by, ahem, certain body parts to care about some little marks.
Pregnancy is definitely the best reason to go, brace yourselves ladies…. SHOPPING! New tops, new pants, new skirts, new shoes, even new underwear! There’s never a better time to splurge, because you totally deserve it! But if you’re a cheapskate like me and prefer not to splurge too much, find clothes that could fit you throughout the pregnancy and could be used for breastfeeding. I did buy one or two nice tops that I could wear to dinners and weddings, but other than that, I bought mostly non-maternity, stretchy tops that could cover my bump but could still be worn after the birth. I also bought a few nursing tops that looks formal enough to be worn to office but casual enough to be worn with jeans and comfy slippers. Instead of buying those overpriced maternity pants in Modern Mum and Mothercare, I bought a few of those stretchy, yoga pants that are so comfy, I still wear them to bed now. For RM19.90! But that nice long dress in Modern Mum looks very nice too. On second thought. Nah, I don’t wear dresses anyway.
Other that shopping for yourself, the next best thing is definitely shopping for the baby. As people keep telling me babies grow so fast that they won’t fit into their clothes for too long, baby clothes are too cute to resist! I remember the first time we went shopping for the baby. It was at a baby fair, so the clothes were quite cheap, ranging from RM5 to RM15 per piece. My husband was exclaiming “Are these clothes for dolls? They’re so small!” as I was searching for pink pajamas and skirts that our unborn daughter wouldn’t be able to fit into until she was 3 months old. We bought the sleep hats that she wore like, 5 times, varied coloured socks, burp cloths, bibs and around a dozen sleepsuits and day-wear. Oh, and my husband couldn't resist buying one of those battery operated fans with flashing lights to clip to her stroller and car seat. Now one of plastic blades is torn from my daughter’s tug.
People are so nice you! They give you way when you get into LRTs, gets up to allow you to sit, give you food for “the baby”, opens doors for you, lets you go forward in a line and so much more. They even smile more to you! A lot of women smile at me and ask me when I’m due, is it a boy or a girl, things like that. My male colleagues bought me food stuff because I was “craving” for it. People tell me I look glowing. I could go on and on.
One of my favourite things in pregnancy – feeling the kicks and turns of your baby inside me. It was the first bonding feeling I felt and was pretty surreal. In the first trimester, all you can confirm of your pregnancy is your protruding belly. But once I felt that first flutter, I was in love with my own tummy! Me and my husband both. He loves stroking my tummy and talking to the baby. Once, after a monthly checkup, the doctor told us that our baby was in a breach position. Even though I was not due until a few months later, I was worried that our baby won’t turn around in time, and I might need to be cut open. My husband “told” the baby softly to turn so she wouldn’t hurt Mommy, and at the next checkup, what do you know? She’s in perfect position for labour! My husband keeps praising her for being such a good girl, until now.

Those were my personal, favourite reasons for being pregnant. If you still need more reasons, read more in this article. You’ll be thanking your lucky stars when you’re done reading.

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy/antenatalhealth/50reasonstobeglad/

Tag Time

2009-05-29T03:07:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of http://comp.webstockpro.com

Activity for: Child & Parents

Summary:

Tag, probably the oldest game in the world, is a great way to help your child burn off some energy and strengthen his muscles.

Tag is an everyday, favourite game in our family. Of course, for now, Daddy is “it” and Mommy is the safe haven. The game always ends with my daughter flying into my arms, laughing madly. It’s the perfect game for extra hyper little tots. (But then again, aren’t all tots extra hyper?) If you keep the rules simple, even young toddlers can catch on quickly.

Start with classic tag - one person is "it" and the other is being chased.
The key is to coax the child with phrases like, "Come and get me!" and "You can't get me!"
You'll want to slow your pace down to a trot so that your little one actually has a chance at tagging you. You also can crawl or walk on your knees if you want to be closer to your child's level.
When it's time for you to be "it," give your child plenty of time to enjoy being "faster" than you. Before too long, he really will be!
As your child learns the ropes of tag, you can try things like Freeze Tag, where the person who gets tagged must remain frozen in place for a period of time, TV Tag, where the person being chased can call out the name of a TV show to avoid being tagged, and even Flashlight Tag, where you tag each other with a beam of light in the darkness.
You can play tag indoors by designating a safe area in which to run around, such as a living room, playroom or childproofed basement. If you use multiple rooms, designate a space to be a "safe zone," such as the kitchen, where kids can take a break without fear of being tagged.
When playing tag outside, make sure to create boundaries so kids don't run anywhere they choose, and take care to remove obstacles such as lawn chairs or rakes. Use the natural environment to create excitement - run around a tree or scamper through the sandbox - or to serve as natural boundaries - don't run past the bushes!

Playing tag with your children is also fantastic exercise for you (that is, if you can keep up). Now, that’s what we call multitasking.

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Bedtime Two Minute Tales

2009-05-27T21:08:00.001-07:00

Bedtime Two Minute Tales – MPH bookstore

This is the first book I bought for my daughter; I bought it at MPH before she was born. It’s a big hardcover book with beautiful illustrations. I started reading it to her when she was around 2 or 3 months old at bedtime. At first my husband laughed at me when I started reading in storytelling tones, you know, in an exaggerated manner with hands waving all around. But when he saw our daughter falling asleep during my storytelling session, he tried it out himself. This remains the “bedtime” book for her because I want her to stop playing, relax and listen to my voice telling her the story.

Now she’s more involved in the storytelling, pointing her fingers at the words and the pictures, laughing when I make animal sounds. She wouldn’t sit in my lap but she would sit on the book itself, so she could see the pictures up close. There are a few torn pages here and there, though. I guess she gets a little too enthusiastic sometimes.

Here are some pictures of the book in action:

She keeps lifting her face up to smile at the camera when my husband snaps the photo.

Engrossed in the book. I think.

She simply loves the camera!

Her favourite story, Fat Cat.

Tone up that flabby tummy with baby!

2009-05-27T00:51:00.001-07:00

Before getting yourself into any kind of exercise, check with your doctor first, especially if you had any complications during delivery or you had Caesarian section. Go slow at first as your body had just gone through a huge ordeal (giving birth) and at any sign of pain, STOP! Try again when you feel ready and painless. Read the article below for some guidelines:

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/baby/ref/postnatalexerciseisbodyready/

These exercises can be done by Daddy too, for some major toning up and bonding time. Try and compete between Mommy & Daddy and see who can do more repetitions with baby. (If Mommy wins, you go, girl! Daddy, you have some serious catching up to do!)

Crunch with Baby

Starting Position:

Lie down on the floor or a mat with knees bent, feet flat on the floor. Sit baby on your hips, resting against her back against your thighs. Gently hold her in position. Keep a space between your chin and chest (looking diagonal towards the ceiling). Engage your abs by pulling your belly button towards your spine.

Action:

EXHALE: Hold onto baby and raise your chest until your shoulder blades lift off the floor. INHALE: Slowly lower back to floor to complete one rep. Aim or 1-3 sets of 10-15 repetitions.

Special Instructions:

Safety should be your main concern, for you and the baby. Make sure that baby is totally secure in all movements. If any exercise is uncomfortable or too strenuous with baby, try it without baby first. Focus on using your abs in a slow, controlled manner. Make sure your abs stay engaged throughout both phases of this movement. Raise your head and shoulders so they are just off the ground, or until you feel your abdominal muscles start to contract (keeping the head, neck and shoulders in line and avoiding tucking the chin in as you crunch). The traditional crunch targets the upper ab muscles (recti).

Reverse Crunches

Starting Position:

Lay baby face down on your shins, facing you while you lie on your back. Hold onto baby with your hands to keep her secure. Keeping your knees bent and your feet off the floor, engage your abdominal muscles by pulling your belly button in towards your spine. Keep a space between your chin and chest (looking diagonal towards the ceiling).

Action:

EXHALE: Lift from your hips, pulling your knees towards your chest, focusing on your abdominals. INHALE: Slowly lower hips and legs back down to the starting position to complete one rep. Aim for 1-3 sets of 10-15 repetitions.

Special Instructions:

Safety should be your main concern, for you and the baby. Make sure that baby is totally secure in all movements. If any exercise is uncomfortable or too strenuous with baby, try it without baby first. This is a very slow, small and deliberate movement. Be careful not to use momentum. Try to keep the motion controlled by your abs.

Source: www.strollerstrides.com

Hiding Hands

2009-05-26T00:26:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.inmagine.com

Activity for: Babies, Toddlers & Parents

Summary:
A hide-and-go-seek game for hands!

By this age, your child may have developed object permanence - the awareness that things exist even if he can't see them. This guessing game is a great way to reinforce this understanding.

Getting Started

Have your child watch you hide a few small finger foods in one hand.
Hold both hands closed in front of your child. Ask him to choose the hand that is holding the snack. (You may have to guide him the first time, or demonstrate with an older sibling first.)
Be sure to express enthusiasm and encouragement whether he gets it right or wrong.
Don't be surprised if your child wants you to play again and again!

My husband has made this game even more fun with our daughter. He’ll hold something small that can be hidden in his palms and pretend to do a magic trick. He’ll blow on his hand and pretend to throw the object away, but secretly hiding it behind him. Then he makes it “appear” behind her ear. This never fails to make her laugh in delight. (A real magician would shake his head in despair at the lameness of the trick. But our "audience" was entertained, so who cares?)

Older-Kid Involvement: Let baby's siblings do the hand-hiding for a while, but be sure to monitor the first few tries so that playful snack-hiding doesn't turn into teasing.

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Play as your baby grows

2009-05-24T22:51:00.001-07:00

Courtesy of www.pharmacymix.com

Play is the way a child learns about the world around him. This article talks about play and development from birth to 2 years old. It explores how children of different ages play and also explains how to choose appropriate play equipment.

Up to 6 Months

In the first months, the baby' senses are not fully developed. He can only see things that are about 8 - 14 inches from his eyes. He enjoys soft sounds and music, your cooing and singing.

At about 3 - 6 months, your child can suck his fingers and grasp a toy that has been put in his hand. He is also beginning to reach for toys and pass it back and forth in his own hands.

Provide toys that are big, colourful, full of sounds and music and preferably moving, like a mobile. Toys at this stage also need to be safe for chewing.

6 - 12 months

At about 9 months, the baby becomes aware that objects still exist even though he can no longer see them. You can hide his favourite toy under his blanket and he will lift it up and voila, he has found it!

Your child is also becoming increasingly mobile - crawling, pulling to stand and cruise. He is also becoming more adept with his hands, picking up whatever he finds on the floor and putting it into his mouth.

Balls are a favourite at this stage. he can crawl after them, throw them and watch them drop with a bounce.

From about 9 months, he also enjoys shape sorters, which test his problem solving abilities, toy telephones which he can use to imitate. He is also able to start stacking crudely when he is close to 12 months.

When he is beginning to walk, he will enjoy push toys as he leans on them and takes a few steps forward.

12 - 24 Months

He can explore all corners of the house. His hands have also become more coordinated, he can scribble a drawing and start to sort out his toys. He is more experimental in his play - what happens if I drop this bowl?

His curios self motivates him to try things repeatedly to gain mastery over it. As he reaches 24 months, he is continually testing his limits and begins to insist on his independence. He will have the infamous temper tantrums as he begins to let you know what he thinks!

At this age, child's play is more active. He is also an imitator of the parent in everyday life. He likes any game that is physically involving.

Provide the child with push and pull toys. Give him large building blocks as his hands are more coordinated and are beginning to stack more effectively. Give him lots of crayons and paper to start scribbling.

Provide your child with a safe area where he can climb, hide, slide and practise all his emerging gross motor skills.

Puzzles will be intriguing at this age, as he is more capable of problem solving and learning from trial and error. Making music with tiny instruments is a thrill as they learn rhythm and tune.

Role of Parents

Parents are the child's best playmates. Creative children are usually the result of adults who have involved themselves with the child's play. The parent must join in and play at the child's level. Daily playtime is a great way to bond with your child.

Courtesy of www.gettyimages.com

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Crawling Obstacle Course

2009-05-22T04:36:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of news.bbc.co.uk

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary: Make a simple obstacle course at home.

Once your baby starts to crawl they are able to explore their environment on their own. You can make a simple obstacle course to challenge them which can contain boxes for tunnels, pillows for mounts and towels or other fabrics for texture. Begin by collecting 2-3 large cardboard boxes e.g. refrigerator or tv boxes, ensuring your baby is able to fit through them easily. Remove any tape or staples that may be attached to the boxes and cut off the flaps. Stick the boxes together with tape. Place things such as stuffed toys in the tunnel to create obstacles.

Place your baby at one end of the tunnel and yourself at the other opening. Call out your baby’s name or wave a toy, encouraging your baby to come towards you. Always praise your baby’s efforts and cheer when they accomplish the task.

For a steady crawler, you can add pillows or large, flat cushions so your baby can climb over them. Then spread a towel in front of it so your baby could feel a different texture on her knees. You can pretty much put anything as long as they encourage your baby to crawl e.g. push a toy car in front of her to indicate to her to follow. I used two turned over dining chairs with a huge towel draped over. When my daughter is passing, I'll tug the towel and cover it over her, turning it into a peekaboo game. Babies don't need expensive toys, really. Just use your imagination!

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Play is a Child's Work

2009-05-22T01:19:00.000-07:00

The many hours that infants and children spend in play are by no means wasted or merely recuperative in nature. Play may be fun but it is serious business in childhood. During these hours, the child steadily builds up his competence in dealing with his environment. A child who is born into this world is like a special sponge - bursting with an inner desire to absorb, explore and find out more about the environment into which he is born.

Play is a course of exploration and discovery, which occupies the most part of a child's play. It only stops when he is asleep. In essence, PLAY IS A CHILD'S WORK.

Like a working adult who learns to solve problems in the work place in order to get the work done, the child learns on a small scale through play the skills necessary for being part of his new environment.

Play influences the physical, mental, social, psychological, emotional and linguistic developments of the child.

Physical Development

As a child crawls, pulls to stand, walks and runs, he experiences movement. This movement will facilitate the development of more complex physical coordination such as being able to use both hands in a particular activity, for instance running. Hence, the child is required to coordinate the swinging movements between the hands and legs.

From the 3rd month of the child's life, he initiates movement from the shoulder and elbow. However, in these early stages, such movements are limited to inaccurate swiping and hitting. As the child plays with smaller and more complex toys, he begins to develop the function in the hands.

Play also develops the muscles and strength in the upper and lower limbs.

Mental Development

In imaginative play, a child may pretend to be a nurse, doctor or a fireman. He may also pretend to cook, sew or have a tea party with his friends. Such imaginative play stimulates the thinking of the child. This will in turn prepare him for more complex learning situations when he is older.

Social Development

As children play with one another, they develop an idea of the world around them. They will learn that there are certain rules which have to be adhered to. These rules involve socialisation such as taking turns at the slide, making friends, the act of giving and taking, sharing or just being friendly.

Although initially, the child will seem to be egocentric and always concerned about himself, he will learn to develop through the guidance of an adult, preferably the parent.

Psychological Development

A child gains confidence and self-esteem when he plays and experiences fun and success in the process. Confidence encourages further exploration and drives the child to experience more challenging activities. Development of confidence will help him meet challenges as he grows older. The process of meeting these challenges further develops skills.

Emotional Development

Bonding with parents is part of a child's first stage of emotional development. There is no substitute for this stage of development. Parents should be involved as much as possible during play. This will allow the child to experience security in his new environment. With this secure feeling, the child will be more willing to move out to explore the world with the assurance that there is always someone to rely on should things turn sour.

Language Development

Language is the medium by which we translate meanings, our thoughts and feelings. Language development starts from day one of birth. Initial attempts at communication are simple and repetitive. As the child develops physically, the language requirements also increase. Children need words and gestures to express ideas and learn to solve problems as they experience new and varied sensations. Language is a unique and wonderful part of play and distinguishes humans as thinking beings in comparison to animals.

The pre-requisites for language development can be reinforced through play. There are numerous opportunities to encourage the following through play:

Eye contact
Listening skills
The paying of attention
The learning to take turns
Social interaction skills

It is useful to label objects when introducing new words to the child as it will increase his vocabulary. The meaning of the words are further reinforced by encouraging the child to handle the object.

Learning Other Concepts

Play also helps children learn and understand basic concepts such as numbers, colours, and spatial positions (left/right and in/out).

Such concept development is a crucial starting point in a child's development as it teaches:

Interaction between objects - how one object is related to another. For instance, pots and the stove, fork and spoon, a ball and a bat.
Interaction with materials. For instance, boiling water is hot, ice is cold, cloth is soft. It helps the child to identify himself with his action and ideas. For instance, if the child does not like the sensation of heat, he may not want to carry the kettle. This gives him greater awareness of what he is capable of doing and teaches him that he can actually do it again.

Understanding the cause and effect relationship. For instance, "If I touch boiling water, I will get burnt." This is the foundation for problem-solving. By solving problems and experiencing and learning the rules about the nature of things, the child learns to adhere to safety rules.

Source: www.huggies.com.my
Information provided by KK Hospital - Singapore's Leading Women and Children's Hospital

Count and Play

2009-05-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

Count and Play - Mytoysandbooks.com

This is her favourite book so far, the one that could hold her attention the longest. As she's a very active kid, longest for her would mean 5 to 10 minutes. For now I keep this book in the car, along with some coloured pencils and paper for scribbling, so she would sit down quietly for some time. Her favourite would be the 4 pizzas, because she could take them off and paste them on repeatedly. Next would be the 1 rabbit, the 2 doors, the 5 birds and the 6 fishes. The 3D stuff that you could actually hold is what makes this book awesome! She would actually point out her finger and "count" in a sing-song voice by herself. Even her older cousins love playing with this book. A truly fantastic and engaging book.

What's there not to love?

Bonding Baby Massage

2009-05-21T03:35:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.goodpregnancyguide.com

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary:
Bonding Baby Massage Pamper your prince or princess with a relaxing rub-down.

Infant massage is excellent for calming colicky and cranky babies, toning their little bodies, and helping them to sleep longer. The skin contact helps baby’s physical development and boosts food absorption.

Baby’s massage checklist:

There isn’t a right or wrong time to massage baby. You could try before or after a bath, or at bedtime. Just ensure you have some uninterrupted time so you can focus on her and really enjoy her reactions.

Baby will wriggle and move about when you massage her, so for safety and comfort, place her on the floor on a large and comfortable mat or towel. Make sure it’s clean!

Turn off any fans or air conditioning. Make sure the room is warm and there’s no draught. We don’t want her to catch a cold.

Make sure that she’s been fed at least an hour ago to avoid queasiness.

Wash and clean your hands, remove watches and jewellery and have some oil or lotion ready.

Some really active babies do not really like being restricted in their movements for too long, which is the case with my daughter. When she started crawling, I reduced the massages and soon stopped altogether. I prefer reading as a relaxing, bonding time. But give it a try with your precious one, she may like it.

Step by step massage:

LEGS

Place baby on her back and rub some lotion or oil on your palm.

Place your palms on baby’s upper thigh and gently “milk” baby’s thigh from hip to feet.

Maintain eye contact and talk to her, whilst observing her reactions.

Repeat each movement five times, doing the same with the other leg.

HANDS

With oil in your palms, start from shoulder to the fingertips, using firm milking movements.

Repeat the same movement five times, doing the same with the other arm.

CHEST

Rub some oil in your palms.

Place your palms on baby’s collarbone. Using firm, gentle movements, criss-cross your palms as you move towards the end of the ribcage.

Repeat the movement five times.

TUMMY

Rub some oil in your palms.

Start massaging from the right side of baby’s abdomen.

Move your hands in a circular clockwise motion around the umbilical area.

Massage five times.

BACK

Place baby on her tummy or on your lap. Rub some oil in your palms.

Place your palms over baby’s shoulder. With firm gentle strokes, work downwards along the spine towards the buttocks.

Repeat five times.

Once you have finished the massage, cover baby with a towel and rub off excess oil with the towel. Dress her up, and you’re done!

Source: www.huggies.com.my and Asian Parenting Today book.

Signing for Little Ones

2009-05-21T02:01:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.deafchildrenandsigning.com

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary:
Help your baby communicate her needs before she is able to talk.

If you feel exasperated listening to your baby cry, think about how frustrated she must feel not being able to tell you what's the matter! Teaching your child sign language can help her communicate her needs without her having to turn on the tears. There are lots of information & graphics on the internet about signing for babies. Before you sign up for a formal course -- or invest in books on the subject -- get your feet wet with these simple techniques.

Select two to three words or phrases that express a request such as: "more," "yes," "no," "bye-bye," "I'm hungry," or "I'm thirsty." Perform a simple hand sign every time you say the corresponding word. For example, move your hands like lobster claws when you say the word "more."

Or point to your mouth when you say, "I'm hungry." The point is to choose a sign that is easy for your child to imitate and remember. Once your child has these signs down, you can build up her vocabulary by adding a few more words at a time. You don’t even have to follow any specific signs, just try and make up some of your own.

But of course, don’t expect your baby to start signing back to you immediately. They need to understand that the signs mean something. Also they also need to be able to imitate the sign you make, which requires some eye and hand coordination. Teaching a baby to sign is a slow process which requires patience, consistency and a lot of repetitions. It’s so easy to lose heart and abandon all when you don’t see any respond from your child. Just think of it as something fun and make it a part of your daily routine, you won’t even notice you’re signing. Your baby will sign back when she’s good and ready.

I’ve heard of some parents’ concerns such as, if you teach your children to sign, they might be reluctant to talk because they can pass the message without uttering a word. Research has proven otherwise, that signing babies talk and read quicker than their non signing counterparts and more calm and relaxed, because they communicate better.

My daughter has one sign down pat i.e. milk, where she opens and closes her fingers into her palm to make a fist. Other than that, she also has goodbye, water and fish in the bag. We are trying to reinforce more basic words with her such as drink, eat, I love you and thank you. The day she signs back, “I love you” back to me, I’ll let you know!

Here’s some websites for your further reading (or you can just Google “baby signing”):

http://www.babysignsmalaysia.com/
http://www.babies-and-sign-language.com/
http://www.signingbaby.com/

Just for you to kick off your own baby signing, print out this cheat sheet and tape it to your fridge. (from http://www.signwithme.com/)

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Reading Rocks!

2009-05-20T21:13:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of www.moseleyworld.com

Activity for: Babies & Parents

Summary of benefits:
Reading to your baby is an activity that serves several purposes. First of all, it's fun! But the benefits beyond that lead to a lifetime of discovery.

Though most kids aren't taught to read until age 5, studies of brain development indicate that the best time to begin reading to children is when they are between the ages of 3 months and 3 years. Experts say children's fundamental language skills are acquired during infancy. An infant's brain grows rapidly between the time she is born and age 4. Active reading, especially when accompanied by sounds, pictures, character voices and physical actions, significantly increases the number and type of neural pathways the brain develops.

Reading is also an ideal way for parents and children to simply take time out to be together. This interaction, in addition to helping children learn about the world around them, creates important bonding time. A study by the Philadelphia-based Commission on Literacy reported that little ones whose caregivers read to them consistently were more emotionally stable and far more likely to achieve academic and work success later in life.

I started reading to my daughter when she was 2 or 3 months old. My parents, my brother and even my own husband were amazed to see me reading to my baby. “It’s not like she understands what you’re saying.” They said to me. It doesn’t matter, I answered. She doesn’t need to understand, I just wanted her to feel comforted by my voice and show her the colorful pictures in the book. I wanted to cultivate a love in reading in her as early as I could, so she would enjoy it in the years to come, just like I did. Now she looked forward to the bedtime reading as much I did. I tried to read to her every night, but being the imperfect mother that I am, I did miss some nights. But it was incredibly satisfying to see her actually wait for me to start reading to her. I felt that I had succeeded in my small mission.

Below are some tips on how to start reading with your child:

Make reading as interactive and fun as possible, and make reading part of your baby's daily routine - a good time is after meals or before bedtime. For me, the bedtime reading has become a major bonding time. I found that my daughter goes to bed without much protest and falls asleep without too much trouble.

Hold your baby when you read to him, take time to let him really look at the pictures and be patient when he flips through pages without actually reading. But if you have a more “involved” child like my daughter, she’d prefer to sit on the book itself to get a closer look.

Point out interesting things on the page, vary your vocal pitch and create character voices.

Stop reading when it's clear that your baby has had enough. As he grows, he will have a longer attention span - make sure you have plenty of books on hand but that you don't mind reading a favorite one over and over! Or, to keep it cheap, buy one book with many stories like I did i.e. Two Minutes Bedtime Stories.

Source: www.huggies.com.my

Busy Baby Noisy Book

2009-05-20T19:40:00.001-07:00

Busy Baby Noisy Book – Mytoysandbooks.com

I bought this together with the Lullaby and Goodnight book, because I read that babies love to look at other babies. It's a big book for a baby and easy enough for her to turn the pages, with colourful pictures of lots of babies doing daily activities such as bathing, eating and feeding. Something like a reference guide for babies, but a very cute one.

At first she would just look at the pictures of the babies in the book. (That’s pretty much what a baby can do at 4 months old.) Now she would pull the book off the shelf by herself and opens it up, babbling all the way. She would press and pull and the noise makers at the right side of the book, she would babble as she points at various pictures of babies. There is a picture of a baby holding a sock to her foot. She would then take a sock from her dirty laundry and try to put it on her own foot (making a mess of her dirty clothes at the same time). I guess she improvised from the guide just a little bit there.

Lullaby and Goodnight

2009-05-20T04:21:00.000-07:00

Lullaby and Goodnight – Mytoysandbooks.com

In my opinion, this is a great book to show your child the bedtime routines. It's nice if you can set up an established routine, as young children loves the predictability and comfort of knowing what's going to come next. Try and repeat the same pattern every night e.g. diaper change, a feed and a story. (I did say try, I varied it myself from night to night, depending on my energy levels. Or what's left off it.)

I bought this for my 14-month old daughter when she 4 months old. At the time, she loves to grab the teddy bear and put it into her mouth. I used to show her the pictures and she would look at them, holding the bear in her hand. She still puts the bear in her mouth, but now she loves it when I bring the bear to life i.e. make as the bear is moving through the motions; drinking the milk, taking the bath and putting on the pajamas. The best part is the goodnight part where she’ll kiss the bear and then kiss me too!

Check out other photos of the book at this page:
http://www.mytoysandbooks.com/lullaby-and-goodnight-bestseller-p-290.html

Buying books or toys? Check these out!

2009-05-20T04:18:00.000-07:00

When you’re out of ideas of do-it-yourself games or crafts to do with your little ones, buy these value-for-money toys. As children spend majority of their time playing, it’s essential that you buy old fashioned, educational toys. When in doubt, don’t worry, just buy books!

One of my favourite toy stores is www.mytoysandbook.com. Oh, I still buy the occasional Fisher Price and Vtech toys, but I love stuff from www.mytoysandbook.com for the educational value of it. They would include the developmental benefits for every product, so I’d have more sound knowledge of everything I buy. Gone are the days where you just buy toys because they look and sound nice. Don’t be cocooned in your blissful ignorance, knowledge is power!

These reviews are based on my observations with my daughter. Reaction may differ from child to child, but we definitely had tremendous fun.

Time is Love

2009-05-20T03:38:00.000-07:00

Do you know why kids cry when you leave them alone, or leave them with someone else e.g. your babysitter, maid or nursery no matter how used they are to this routine? My 14-month old daughter is content, just playing around me when I sit down to watch tv. Oh, she runs around, go make a mess here and there, but she’ll always come back to me. She always wants to be picked up, she always wants me to hold her hand, she follows me around practically everywhere. Why?

Because to children, time is love. The more time you spend with your children, the more they’ll love you. Guaranteed.

Your kids will be kids only once. Sure, they cry a lot, want your attention all the time, fight with their siblings to get your attention, make messes faster than you can clean them up and practically tear down the whole house. But remember, they’ll grow up and go to school, become teenagers, then become young adults. Before you know it, they’ll be leaving your home for college, a job in another city, to get married and finally, settle down in their own nest. All you have left are some baby photos and you wonder, where have all the years gone by?

A very busy, hardworking colleague once told me, “It’s like she grew up before my eyes. I wake up from my work slumber and there she is, all grown up.”

Don’t let this happen to you! Imagine if someone asks your children, “What were your favorite moments with your mom/dad when you were young?” Your kid hesitates and answers, “I don’t know, they were never home.” Spend time with your children every day, no matter how busy you are. Even for five or ten minutes daily before she goes to bed.

Go out and fly kites. Go swimming, run or have picnics in the park. Go to shopping malls, libraries, museums, zoos, beaches. Or stay home and cook together. Have a family movie night. Play games, make some craft, read together. There are so many things you could do as a family.

I’ve read, compiled from other sources and tried some of these activities myself. Also, I’ve included information on child development for your reading pleasure so you know why it’s important to take some time and play with your kids. Besides having fun, I try to incorporate some kind of learning in every possible activity, so kids would know that learning doesn’t have to be boring, it can be fun! Some activity ideas in here are so basic; you must have done it with your baby at some point in her life. But don’t take my word for it, try them out yourselves. Spend a stash of money or keep it low budget, take your pick. Now, turn that tv off and go and have fun!